I'm going to take a break, a break from constant fretting and searching. My problem is that I need to stop jumping on every small hint or glimmer of hope whether it be love or opportunity. It's so childish and doesn't make any headway in terms of progress or making me a better person.
Love isn't something you search for. Love is something that will happen when the time is right. It will come at the most unexpected of times and in the most unexpected of places. This constant search I've been on hasn't produced fruit because I've adopted such a self-centered me-me-me attitude towards it. I'm wrong and I'm actually happy to admit to that. I'm single and it's nothing to be ashamed of. With only 18 years under my belt there is lots of time to experience new things and meet new people; it's exciting.
I will find him, or he will find me. I can never know when or where because that's all part of the big scheme of things. Life's like riding a roller coaster for the first time; you can see all its twists and turns, crests and troughs while waiting in line and imagine the sensation of flying through every one of them, but until you reach them, you will never feel that lightness in your seat or those butterflies in your stomach. Heck, that corkscrew could turn out to be as exciting as you expected or more than you ever could have imagined. Right now I'm on the slow climb up; the top of the first hill is near yet I don't know exactly what lies on the other side. It's probably going to be a wild ride up ahead but I'm ready.
Join me, won't you?
We're in for the ride of a lifetime.
Im back in London
6 days ago