Winter has Come. Happy 2014!

I've made more promises than I have been able to keep when it comes to this blog. From when I first started writing back in 2009, this became my way medium for expressing things I could otherwise not say and also as a chronicle of my everyday life. Today, it's been neglected. I'm sorry, Une Vie Compliquee, I have let you fall into disrepair. Here, then, is m latest attempt to revive you.

*                                     *                                       *                   

Soon 2013 will be coming to an end. It seems crazy that it's happening so soon. Over a year ago I returned from Denmark and possibly the best semester of my life. I have completed another semester of college and now only have one left. Heck, I remember talking about how I though graduating high school was crazy on this blog; now, heck, I'll be entering the real world. 2013 has, in fact, flown by.

Nostalgia aside, many things have changed since I last wrote in October:

1. I finally found a job for the Spring semester. The search that I began back in October bore fruit in late November. I'm currently working at the university over winter break and will be working the same job in the Spring as well. I'm dropping to part-time student status in my final semester since I only need two more classes. It will be nice to be able to earn some money while I look for a permanent job as well.

2. I rocked this last semester. I pulled off the amazing my first semester of senior year. I ended up getting the highest grades I have ever gotten at college, pulling off straight As for the first time ever. I worked hard and it all paid off in the end.

3. The guy I mentioned in my last post, the junior who I have known for a few years now, we're now together. I don't know how much I will write in the future on this blog (I'm not gonna say I will because, well, we know how that turned out last time), so I'm hesitant to give him a name, but I will. We'll call him Clark. Clark and I bonded over his hospital stay, and since then, things have really progressed. We went on many dates and we made things official during this past finals period of all times. He's a fun, smart, hot, and all around amazing guy. If there is a way to sum it up, he makes me happy. He is, I guess, also my first official boyfriend. 

4. I got a smartphone. Yes, my few remaining readers, I only just got a smartphone. I broke off from my dad's cell plan and will now be paying for everything myself since I have a source of income, and well, because I think it's the responsible things to do. No, I did not get an iPhone; i'm an Android kind of guy.

2013 ended up being a pretty great year. I'm still really excited to see what 2014 has in store and the new adventures that await. Hopefully it will involve a job, Clark, and happy memories.

So, my dear readers, at least for those of you who have stuck around and listened to the ramblings of a now 21 year old near college graduate from since he was in high school. I wish you the happiest of new years and good health.

All the best,

JP

Where Have I Been?

I realize it has been nearly two months now since I last posted on here. I haven't died, been injured, or been abducted - I actually wanted to let everyone know that everything is going well. Actually very well.

I've settled in nicely into the house. The housemates, after a warming up period, are all pretty cool too. The house had its fair share of issues earlier this month - the plumbing in the basement was a bit wonky so we had to do a few repairs and the AC blew out at the start of September - but everything is good now. I worked hard to make my room my own little escape in case I need to get work done or just relax and I'm really happy with how it turned out. I've had it described as "Hyatt or Hilton-like" which I think is a good thing.

My classes are also going well so far. I'm only taking four this semester and will be taking only two next semester and dropping to part time. I'm graduating in May and got ahead with credit transfers and the like which is why I am able to get away with not having to do a full 15 credit schedule. Grades have been solid so far and I just found out I aced my Operations Management midterm which has me really happy. In addition to Operations I'm also taking a course on managing brands, a class on conducting business marketing research, and a class on sexuality studies for fun.

I'm still involved in the grilling club and despite saying I would retire from doing publicity work for theatre groups, I got pulled in to do be a mentor for another show this fall. I'm also still involved in the LGBT organization on campus which has been pretty hectic because October has coming out week and all sorts of events. Other than these, I've been trying to focus on getting a job for the Spring semester and also for after I graduate. I think I want to stay in the DC area after I graduate so that is where my search is centered around as of now. Of course, if an amazing opportunity presents itself away from home, I'll definitely give it a lot of consideration.

On the personal front, Brandon and I are still talking but things have changed. After summer ended, we realized that despite what I would have wanted, things would likely never work out for us given my school schedule, his work schedule, and the fact that he will be moving to North Carolina at the end of the year. What he do agree on is that we both truly care about each other and we will always be friends. At this point he's like a brother to me; we've shared our life stories to each other and spent many beautiful, memorable nights together, but I realized it was time to move on. It hurt and was tough, but life goes on.

Here on campus, I recently starting seeing a guy I've known since my sophomore year when he was a freshman. He's now a junior and while we were never very close back then, we have gotten to known each other much more this fall. Recently he was in the hospital to get a few surgeries and I've been spending the last few nights with him to keep him company. I don't know where this is headed and where we currently stand, but I figured that he could always use someone to keep him company when he's trapped in his sterile prison. He's a really sweet guy, really clever, and we can just talk for hours without getting bored; something very very few people could ever say. I know it's senior year and relationships built this late in the game are risky, but maybe I'll be willing to take this risk. It certainly is headed in the right direction so far.

So yeah, I apologize for disappearing. I know I have really dropped the ball this year on posting. Senior year was supposed to be easy and relaxing but in reality it is everything but that. I can't say when I will post next, but if anything major does happen, expect to hear from me.

Hope everyone has been well and if you're still reading this, thanks for the continued readership and support. It's been over four years since I started this blog and I've surprised I've made it this far. Here's to hopefully many more to come.

All the best,

JP

Sunday

Sometimes the inevitable are the hardest things to accept.

The last thing I want is for us to just slowly grow apart; that's worse than any harsh falling out could ever be in my mind.

Summer 2013: Work, Sleep, Go on an Emotional Roller Coaster. Repeat Daily.

Is this what adulthood feels like?



Move in: T-minus 2 days

Senior Year: T-minus 4 days

A Snapshot

My Current Book: The Kite Runner

My Current Book On Hold: Freakonomics

My Current Obsession: Getting lost in my imaginings of hyper-romanticized scenes of an uncertain future.

My Current Love: Brandon

My Current Favorite TV Show: How It's Made

My Current Mood: Pensive

My Current Guilty Pleasure: Excess sleeping on the weekends

My Latest Purchase: B&N Nook HD+ 32GB, Nova Launcher Installed



And finally, a story for thought:

"Once Zhuangzi dreamt he was a butterfly, a butterfly flitting and fluttering around, happy with himself and doing as he pleased. He didn't know he was Zhuangzi. Suddenly he woke up and there he was, solid and unmistakable Zhuangzi. But he didn't know if he was Zhuangzi who had dreamt he was a butterfly, or a butterfly dreaming he was Zhuangzi...."

-Zhuang Zhou, Philosopher, 4th Century BCE.

-JP

And So It Begins.

Ah summer. When the humidity reaches 90%, the sun is unbearable, and I hate driving as my butt burns on my car's leather seats (first world problem, I know). I guess I'm kind of an odd guy when I say that I'm actually not the biggest fan of summer. Give me a nice cool, breezy fall day any day. Nevertheless, this summer is a bit different than my previous summers. Let me explain.

To fully put things in reference, how summer 2013 got its start begins back in January. That's when I began my internship search as you guys heard about way back when. Well, after a long, long process, many interviews, many non-responses, and lots of sleepless nights, I finally got myself an internship in DC for the summer. Basically, the reason why I basically didn't write anything for the past few months is because of this search and also trying to finish off junior year well (which I did!).

So what's making this summer special is that for the first time, ever, really, I have a real job(ish). It's an internship, but basically I'm working Monday through Friday, 9-5:30 at a large and well known non-profit and PAC. I'm working in the marketing department with one other intern. My first day was about two weeks ago and my first full week went well. So far I've met about 2/3 of the interns, another third is starting over the next two weeks. It's a big group of characters which makes things pretty interesting. Considering I have a much more laid back personality than many of the interns, it can make for some quiet personality clashes but it's not really an issue. So far I've been doing  lot of research and administrative work but later on once all the interns arrive, there will be more group level projects.

The rest of the summer looks pretty tame for the most part. Mostly finding time to relax on the weekend, chilling with friends in DC, and spending time with Brandon. After how hectic and crazy junior year was with study abroad and school, I really am looking forward to a chill, calm summer.

Sorry for the brevity of this post, but once I get more settled in to a routine, I'm positive I'll have plenty of stories to share from work and the crazy shit that inevitably will happen when you get  a couple dozen 20-somethings together to work in DC.

Until then, enjoy the weather and Happy Pride!

-JP

I'm Back

Hey guys,

So I've gotten a few emails from people wondering if I was okay and where I had disappeared to. Well, I'm happy to report that I'm alive and well. The reason I was gone for the past month is because I've been basically too busy with school/clubs/internship stuff that I had to put a lot of my more pleasure activities to the back burner, this blog being one of them. Now, however, I'm home, done with my junior year, employed (yay!), and will be filling you guys in on what's been going on in the near future.

Again, thanks for the support and concern for those of you who reached out to me, I really appreciate it. I hope to get this blog up and running again now that it's summer.

All the best,

JP

Not Gay Enough

I have an issue with the LGBT group on campus. It's not about the messages they are trying to send or the efforts they undertake to make LGBT issues on campus more visible, it's how they go about doing it.

I was recently elected to the board of my school's LGBT organization and almost immediately I felt tension between myself and the rest of the members. I tried to keep it as internalized as I could, and so far I hope I've done it well. After today however, I am beginning to question just how long I will be able to do so. Let me explain.

In all honesty, I feel the LGBT organization here at my school does a poor job of representing the gay community on campus. The board members, as nice and well intentioned as they are, represent only the most extreme of the socially and stereotypically "gay" community. This is where I feel out of place and at odds against the rest of the board. Yes, I am obviously gay, but I'm also not very "gay acting" in the stereotypical sense. So while the rest of the board is singing, going out to a drag show brunch in DC, buying wigs, and being well...really gay, I'm feeling not only excluded and unable to identify with what they seem to enjoy, but even uncomfortable.

For me, being gay is the part of me which regards my sexual preference towards men, not necessarily how I act, my music preferences, going out habits, or something else. So while I'm happy chilling with my roommates, being involved with the grilling club, and even tossing around the word "bro" and "man" now and then, my fellow board mates, I feel, seem to view what I do with an air of curiosity and even disapproval. Quite honestly, I don't feel gay enough to be part of the organization at the level at which I am now obligated to be in.

A fellow member made a comment a week ago which struck me as both odd and even slightly offensive. We were discussing casually how some event turnout is low, and he casually said:

"Those gays who conform to the straight norm, I hate them"

For being a group so concerned with equality and the right to self expression, I found this off handed remark to be both shocking and disappointing. By saying that, I felt like he was implying that being "straight acting" or even just not being like him, an out and somewhat flamboyant gay man, was wrong. While I didn't address the issue then and there, I found myself angry later on because I identified with that group he had just expressed hatred towards. By no means am I "conforming" to anything. I do what I do and act how I act because that is what I'm comfortable doing. I am not putting on a show, literally "acting" like a straight male, because I feel pressured to do so; I act "straight" because that is just how I naturally act. I'm gay because I like guys, not because I have to act a certain way.

Getting back to the point, the LGBT organization I feel is a poor representation of what I feel the LGBT community at my school is. Gay students at my school range from the gayest, most flamboyant of men and the butchest of lesbians to the most ordinary and "straight acting" men and women. Upcoming events, including the annual drag dance, are proposed to be advertised with drag queens riding on the back of a golf cart and lots of rainbow flags and glitter. In addition, all of this is to be done during an accepted students weekend, where high school seniors ill be visiting campus and deciding if they want to come to my school or not. I feel this plan is a horrible idea and I wish I had the courage to speak up at the time to voice my objection to this. Not only does it send the wrong message that being "gay" at my school is only about the aforementioned things, but it only reinforces the stereotypes about the LGBT community on a camps which is already not the most gay friendly in the world. I'm actually worried that some bright prospective students could be scared off if they saw that.

With events like these and the means by which they are being publicised, I feel like it's my duty to bring some balance to the club and be the voice of a group that is often ignored. While the other board members are too preoccupied with gay power, rainbows, and glitter bombing people (yes, it was an actual comment/suggestion made), I feel like I need to be the voice that speaks up and explains maybe why a large portion of the LGBT community feel alienated by the club's activities. Maybe if they get the message that people might actually be uncomfortable by what they are doing by being the voice and face of the LGBT community, they might recognize why event attendance is so low. There are many faces to being gay, and right now, only a very small handful are being shown by the club. This has been a reason told to me by a few of my gay friends as to why they don't show up at club sponsored events, because they think an affiliation between them and the club is undesirable.

Next week, I hope to open a discussion during our weekly board meeting and address some of these issues. As the club is supposed to be about inclusion and bringing the voice of LGBT students and issues to the university community, I feel that it is time that the club be brought more towards the center of the gay spectrum. The clubs needs to project an image that says yes, it's OK to be gay and like sports and that it is just as OK to be gay and enjoy going to drag shows every weekend. Maybe, hopefully, the club could then grow and be a student organization that all LGBT individuals could be proud to say they're a member of and willingly attend events of, rather than the small, consistent group now that exists now.

JP

Forget

I do it all to forget.

I drink because I want to forget.

I run because I want to forget.

I work out because I want to forget.

I cook because I want to forget.

I feel trapped. Behind the smiles and light conversation, we all know we're fighting against each other for that one job, that one position, that one moment of acknowledgement that you did something right for once.

I miss feeling like I'm in control of things. I miss having that close knit group that I can always rely on. I miss the way things were.

To a Friend.

I love you more than you will ever know.

You've been there for me through my darkest times and in my happiest moments.

You make me laugh.

You make me smile.

You make me realize that there are still good people in this world.

I am so lucky to have met you all those years ago.

We've had our moments,

Moments were we didn't always get along,

But we always got through them and our bond got stronger.

Sometimes I wonder what things would be like if I didn't meet you,

And it scares me to think about who I might have ended up being today if it weren't for your influence.

But I did meet you, and I'm glad.

So when we're old and wrinkly

And have more stories to tell than any library in the world could ever contain,

We'll still be laughing

and smiling

and talking about all the crazy shit we've done.

And even if we don't adopt an Asian baby together

it will be fine,

Because you're the best thing that has ever happened to me.

You're my soul mate.

I love you forever and always.

The "L" Word

I thought I was going to try and get over him....we were too different, at two different points in our lives. Then last night...

"I love you."

I thought I would never hear him say those words.

"I love you too."

The Slutty Phase

I have quite a few regrets in my life - missed opportunities, saying things I wish I had kept to myself, and most pertinent to this post - things I have done.

The image I may have portrayed on this blog since I began it back during my junior year of high school might be one of me being "the good boy" for the most part. Indeed, I have tried my best to be studious, socially active, and to take care of myself. Well, defying the point of this blog as a means of me to talk about things I hide from the public, I have held out on you guys, but hopefully this will be a first step to eventually precede many more. I'm going to try and open up, at least a little, and get some things of my chest that recently have been weighing on me, especially now that I'm home and have time to think about things other than school work. Call it my guilty conscious getting the better of me once again (it's a side of me that has plagued me since I was little), but maybe this is my cue to start talking about it a little.

My slutty phase lasted for a rather long time. You know how some people are habitually always on the prowl and some just have that one week where all they want to do is get with anyone that happens to walk by? For me, my slutty phase lasted from the end of freshman year of college through winter break of sophomore year - a solid seven months of horniness that now haunts me with the potential consequences of what I have done.

After entering college and actually getting with a guy for the first time instead of just dreaming about it while I was alone, it felt like a whole new world opened for me. It was a drug- the roughness of holding a guy and getting hot and heavy in the back corner of a room. It only took one hit and I was hooked. As many of of you guys might know, years of holding back feelings that you knew you could not actually recognize or act on suddenly being released is something that is hard to control, and by the end of freshman year, things were bad. As the summer between freshman and sophomore year began, I was stuck back at home, but my craving still continued. Still partially reeling from Mark and the few other guys I hooked up with my freshman year of college, I realized I wanted more, and I wouldn't let be being stuck at home alone stop me. Thus began my slutty phase.

The internet is a dangerous place for many reasons. As people know, anonymity makes you both powerful yet weak. Nobody cares who you are if you don't want to reveal your name, yet that same can be applied right back to you. There is not nearly as much need for trust, disclosure, or socializing to a meaningful extent like there is meeting people in real life. Only a few weeks into my summer break did I start turning to online resources to get with guys. Grindr happened first but that was lacklustre and my need for physical contact quickly outgrew the frequently 40+ y/o guys that would try to chat me up and that I continuously denied. Yes, I did actually hook up with one guy via Grindr, it was a sloppy, uncomfortable experience at his apartment in Virginia which made me question if I wanted to continue with what I was doing; that view lasted all of a few days. Soon after I ended up back on the web searching for the next guy, this time using a site that has a less than stellar reputation, (I think you can figure it out), but nevertheless, it worked.

Looking back, I regret letting myself stoop to such a low level as I did for sex. Grindr was bad enough, but this was even worse. Why did I keeping going back to it? I think it was the excitement. It was the raw, no-string-attached type of stuff I was after at the time. It was so accessible and so easy; all it took was saying what we were looking for, some pictures, and we were off to the races. I didn't let myself stoop to the level of sending anything X-rated (something I would never do) though it was something many others readily did. Once school started again, first semester sophomore year let me get a break from this online circus which only started back up come winter break 2011-2012. That winter I ended up messing around with a guy at a local university. Awkwardly, I've seen him around since then because he works at Tysons Corner Mall. Whoops.

I between summer and winter got with 6 guys via my online escapades. Ages ranged from 19 to mid-20s. There were students, a department of defence employee, a store manager, and some who I had no idea of what they did. I'm not going to lie and say those hookups weren't hot - they were, but the means I used to get them is something I am not even close to being proud of. If I had the chance, I would go back and stop myself from going as far as I did. It was a mistake, a huge one. It's one that could come back to haunt me and damage my reputation and career later in life if it came to light- something I'll just have to deal with. In addition, while I didn't engage in any unsafe acts, I knew there were health risks that I could have put myself in. Even before my slutty phase began, I had already gotten into the habit of getting tested for STDs periodically which I continue to do. All is clear thankfully, but that is yet another needlessly risky thing I did.

My slutty phase is something I'm glad is over, however, just because my slutty phase is over doesn't mean I've gone celibate, quite far from it actually, but I've definitely slowed things down and am not jumping guy to guy every week now. What brought about an end to it? I think it was because the novelty of it finally wore off. When I was seeing a new guy so frequently, part of what kept me going was because it was exciting. It was the fact that (presumably) I wouldn't have to see that person again and that things could be full throttle from the start. By the end of it, I didn't get that rush anymore. It got, well, boring, and my slutty phase died out. It wasn't until later did my logical side catch up and remind me of the consequences of my actions.

Have I been tempted by the lure of the anonymous hookup since? Yes. Have I acted on it? No. It was a once time thing, albeit a very long one time thing in my life. It's not something I'm proud of, though I will always remember the rush of trying to escape the consequences, jumping from one dude to the next. My slutty phase was another chapter in my life. It was hot, it was fun, it was dangerous, and I'm happy I got it out of my system.

Lessons learned, memories made, stories one day to be told.

-JP

Can't Hold Us Troublemakers

I just wanted to share two songs. The first is unofficially the theme song of my apartment. Everyone in my apartment loves Macklemore (though some are bitter because they liked him before he became "cool" what hipsters....). Nevertheless, he's brilliant in my mind. Compared to other artists and rappers, he's much more serious in tone in many of his songs without being overbearing which is refreshing.


Macklemore: Can't Hold Us

The second song is Troublemaker by Olly Murs. I'm not going to lie, I thought it was Maroon 5 when I first heard this song but that isn't necessarily a bad thing. It's a fun song and is a solid part of my study playlist now.


Olly Murs - Troublemaker

Enjoy :)

Love in the Air

So.....hi there.....

It's been a while, eh? So what happened exactly? Well, with school starting up, I made a series of promises to myself. First, that I would try and get as much work done as possible ahead of time for classes, second, that I would do all my assigned readings, and third, I would go to the gym as frequently as possible, with an aim for 4x a week. Ever since the end of January happened and classes really kicked into high gear, I realized that Junior year was going to be rough work wise. Unfortunately, in order to keep up with everything, some others things ended up getting neglected, one of which was my blog. Nevertheless, I'm going to try and start writing more again, and that promise begins now.

So since I was last here, lots of stuff has happened. I'll break it down for you:

1. Classes: Classes as I mentioned have been revving up. These next two weeks are going to be rough as midterms start next week and I have papers and all sorts of assignments due this week. For the most part, its just been keeping up with the piles of cases I've had to read and also articles for other classes. My professors for the most part have been really cool. I especially love my business law professor and my other business class professors. One professor however, my anthropology professor, I haven't been so keen about. Her classes are literally all spent on discussion and her going on tangents about her own experiences with little time dedicated to actually teaching the material. As such, I've been left to try and figure things out on my own from the book which is not a style of learning that I do well with. I'm hoping that she spends time to actually review with us before the midterm. Maybe it's just me, but if I'm paying thousands to go to a school, I expect professors to put an effort in to actually teach the material.

2. The Roomies: Everything is going really well with the roomies. My roommate E's girlfriend visits every weekend which is really awesome since we all love her. For Valentine's Day she brought us four dozen cookies which was so awesome in addition to an ice luge and more Wii controllers. Otherwise, my other roommates C and A are also doing well. We're all pretty busy so we hang mostly late at night and on the weekends.

Ice Luge. We drink a lot in this house. I'm not going to lie.

3. Guys: The situation between Brandon and I have cooled a bit in the past few weeks. I think the fact that we don't live near each other (relatively) and that he works and I still go to school puts a hindrance on every being able to see each other. Also, the one time we almost did decide to hang out he bailed last minute which ended up pissing me off. We haven't spoken for almost a week now. I'm pretty sure that I know what he was looking for out of our "relationship" and while it worked over the summer, I think I'm looking for something more. Given that, there is another dude who is in the news. This is a guy who I've known since freshman year and always kinda liked and found attractive, but since he was a year ahead and had a boyfriend at the time I didn't really bother with. A few weeks ago that changed and we ended up chilling at his place after a party we were both at. We hung out a few times after that and come February 13th....

4. Valentine's Day: I asked him out to dinner for Valentine's Day. We ended up getting dinner near campus at an upscale burger place (we agreed that we didn't want something formal). It was cool and we talked a good bit at dinner. He's a senior from New England, about 5'10', blond, slim, and ran track. He's also involved somewhat with the theatre group I'm working with. He's a funny dude, a little awkward at times but otherwise fun to hang out with. He's been gone this weekend for a conference in Nashville but we've been talking every day which is nice and cute of him. At this point I don't know where things might be headed but the feelings are mutual. So who knows, it's a little scary but also pretty exciting.

5. Jobs/Internships: I've been searching and I have a few bookmarked but I haven't had time to start applying truly. I'm looking for marketing and PR style positions and I know I want to stay in the DC area this summer for sure. I'm definitely going to apply to the HRC once their application is released but otherwise, I'd be happy with any company right now. If anyone knows of some good companies to look for internships at, please let me know!

So that's what has been going on in a nutshell recently. It's been a lot of busy work with a some time to relax mixed in. My goal for this semester is to match my last semester sophomore year before I went abroad and get on the Dean's List again. It's an uphill battle but I have high hopes for the semester.

Also, I see I have a few new followers so a huge "hi" and "welcome"! Sorry I've been boring lately but I'll get some opinion pieces out there soon.

All the best,

JP

Diet Coke

Sorry gents, I've been busy with classes and homework so I don't have much time to write unfortunately. Things have been pretty smooth sailing here though so hopefully I'll find time to start that series of posts on Gay Stereotypes I promised.

In the mean time, enjoy this ad :P



Cheers,

JP

Oh Hey Mr. President

Hey guys, I haven't posted in a week since things have been pretty hectic with the first official full week of classes all, but there have been some events that have transpired which I want to share.

First, I'm out of that horrid Linguistics class. The professor was unhelpful, the material being taught required a level of prior knowledge in linguistics which I did not possess (which, given it was quoted as a "no previous reqs" class kinda pisses me off). Instead, I enrolled in an Anthropology class. I've taken psych and sociology classes before and I feel this will complement them well. So far, it's a pretty decent class (given the one class I've attended so far) and I hope I'll enjoy it. The professor seems nice and the course load seems reasonable. My other classes have been going pretty well as well. I've been able to stay ahead of my readings and work which I hope to continue the rest of the semester. Given that, I expect the work load to start piling up more soon, and now that I'm working as publicity director again for another show with one of the theatre groups on campus, that will also start eating into my time.

Moving on, living with the roomies has been awesome. This past week, E's girlfriend was here which was awesome since we all love her. She goes to school in New Jersey but visits often and will be doing an internship in DC this semester as part of her university's internship/class program so we will be seeing her pretty often. Me and E's girlfriend get along really well and chat about lots of stuff (guys mostly haha) which is funny since behind a lot of the questions we ask one another, she seems determined to find out my type. She jokes that even though she's with E, we're true soul mates and should be together instead haha.

In my personal life, I do have some complicated news. At the start of the year, a sophomore and I had a quick fling, but while he was really into me, I wasn't really into him. After a week of constant texts, I decided to cut things off with him. I said I was still trying to figure things out and didn't know what I really wanted in my personal life, though I'd be totally cool to still be friends.  He was really appreciative that I was being honest with him and we're on good terms which nice. I think why I didn't really feel really interested in the sophomore is that I'm still really into Brandon. We text and stay in contact and once everything settles down, we're going to try and see if I can get him to DC and show him around and stay for a Friday or Saturday. The next time I see him I hope to settle things for once and see where things are headed for us. The last time I saw him, I got caught up in just being with him and we ended up falling asleep on the couch until I woke up since one of his roommates came back. In the end, I just want to know if things are worth pursuing beyond just being close buds like we are now.

This past weekend was a four-day one for me since I have no classes Friday and we had today off for MLK Day/The Inauguration. Saturday, we tried to throw a surprise birthday party for E's 21st birthday but he caught us wheeling the keg dolly away from campus back to the store. E's girlfriend was supposed to keep him away from the apartment longer but he kept insisting to go back since he had work to do. After they ran into us, she tried to explain things like how we might be trying to move out a fridge or helping a friend move their stuff, but a keg dolly is pretty obvious and there was a keg sitting in the kitchen when they got in the apartment. The whole series of events was a pretty funny after the slight disappointment wore off. The party itself went well - lots of people showed up, the music was sick, we had a laser light, pong, and E had a fun time. The fact that the apartment didn't get trashed either was a nice surprise. The next birthday is my roommate R's 21st in May which means we have some time until the next big party rolls in.

Now, given I go to school in DC, it's only fitting that I participate a least a little in the inaugural events going on for Obama's 2nd term. E, his girlfriend, and I decided that we were going to skip the inauguration itself and instead go see the parade. We left at 10:30 and walked to near the Treasury Department building and grab a spot. We ended up getting a great spot though the wait took forever since the parade itself started late. Here's some pics from the event:



It began with the Metro Police



Pershing's Own Army Band




Representatives from all branches of the armed forces came next



And then it was time for Obama!

It was pretty sick I gotta say. Obama walked for a bit before he reached where we were standing and I wish he came out again, but nevertheless, it was really cool. Biden, Michelle, and other key members of Congress were also riding with the same group as the President.

Alright guys, that's all I have to report for now. Hope things are going well for everyone.

Cheers,

JP

Welcome Back - Spring 2013

Hey guys. It's been a little while but I do have some updates I want to pass along. First, I'm all moved in back on campus! Classes started on Wednesday so I began moving my stuff on Monday. One of my roommates moved back already so me and another guy took advantage of that so it wouldn't be such a mess on the actual move-in date on Tuesday. I'm finally out of dorm housing and am now in an apartment which is still school owned. It's a two bedroom, four person flat with a massive living/dining room but a tiny kitchen; it gets the job done though. The guys I'm living with are really awesome. I've known all of them since at least Sophomore year if not longer, and yes, I'm out to all of them: two of them since freshman year, and they're cool with it all and really supportive.

I'm taking five classes this semester: Advanced International Business, Business Law, Management Science and Decision Making, Buyer Behavior, and for kicks Sounds of Language which is a linguistics class. I only have classes Mon-Thur which is sweet but I did have to take an 8AM class to get it which is kind of a pain. So far, my classes already seem much more difficult than Denmark which is expected, but getting back into the groove of things is still going to be a challenge. Advanced IB is also the last class in order to complete my International Business major so that will probably be a lot of work. The other classes are basically working towards my Marketing major (it's official, I got my faculty advisor signatures and did all the paperwork) and the Linguistics class is basically going to a liberal arts credit. The linguistics class is actually a class I thought would be pretty simple but now I'm kind of scared because I will have to learn and be able to reproduce the International Phonetic Alphabet which entails learning this which is more than a little intimidating. If anyone out there has taken a linguistics course or is a linguistics major/nerd do you have any tips?  Other than that, I'm expecting this semester to be pretty challenging so I gotta be sure to balance work/play.

Other than school stuff, I'm looking for summer internships. Most companies who are posting summer internships are mostly large investment banking and consulting firms like Barclays, Goldman, Credit Suisse which don't really fit into my major. I'm just looking and hoping something shows up. It's nerve racking since almost everyone else in the business school (aka Finance majors) is constantly going to networking events and scrambling to get in their applications for the summer while I'm kinda stuck until more marketing type internships open up. I talked to one of the marketing professors who pointed me in the directions of a few government agencies which I think I'm going to look into like the Department of Commerce which could be a good bet. One thing that does annoy me about my school is that while it does attract some very well known and powerful recruiters, it's such a finance-centric atmosphere that it leaves many others who aren't in the field or major a bit out of the loop. Nevertheless, the two professors I talked to said later in the semester there will be more opportunities for networking events with more marketing type firms which I'll attend. I'll also have to go to some on-campus interviewing workshop for later in the semester when even more recruiters start coming on campus.

Yesterday was the Spring activities fair where basically all the clubs and organizations come out and table for all the students to come see what they're all about. First I helped with the the grilling club which is doing well; in the semester me one of my roommates who is also in the club were gone, the number of new members - freshmen and sophomores, went up at least 50% which is pretty awesome. They all seem really nice and kinda shy at first (perks of being senior to them haha) but they open up quickly. There's a pair of them at the post-grill party who were hella good at beer pong though. They were on a 8 game winning streak when I left last night which probably is a new record. Me and my roommate E were ahead until the last cup when they narrowed it down to 1-to-1 and bounce shotted it in. Overall though, the weather was beautiful and the grill was sucessful. I also did some tabling for the LGBT club on campus. It went well but I don't feel as particularly close to them as I used to, I guess mostly because many of the members don't really have enough in common with me for something like that. Most of the guys in the club are, and I don't mean this in a derogatory way, really, really gay. Like, you can tell after two seconds gay. Everyone should be happy with who they are and whatever they do, but for me, it makes being able to identify with the rest of the LGBT population for difficult. I'll probably go into depth about this more in the future post since I've been thinking about this for a while now.

Alright, well that's what's been going on in the past few days in a nutshell. Hopefully I will find time to write in the future once classes really start getting underway. I'm planning to start a series of posts regarding stereotypes in the LGBT community and specifically its impact in a college atmosphere so hopefully you guys will find that interesting. I did a similar post a few years ago which you can read here but I plan on expanding and going into more depth in this series.

Cheers everyone; I hope everyone is doing well.

All the best,

JP

Dammit Shanahan!

The Redskins were off to such a hot start, damn. We had such great momentum out of the gate; RGIII was playing well, and we got a 14 point lead, and then, inevitably, RGIII's knee began acting up. Shanahan should have switched him out for Cousins right after that second touchdown; RGIII was already limping pretty badly at that point. Instead, he kept in and he got worse and worse.

Endangering your rising star QB like that and having him play when we clearly couldn't move quickly or well enough for a game like this was such a stupid move. Gah, yeah, I'm just annoyed as eff.

I still have faith in my home team, but this game was the biggest tease ever.

At least the Ravens won today....

Happy New Year! and a Question

Hey guys! I hope y'all had a fun start to 2013. I spent my new year in New York with some friends which was pretty sick. New year eve we went to my friend's cousin's place in Brooklyn for a party he was throwing. I got too drunk for my own good and got a little quite messy which I'm not the most proud of but whatever. I ended up being the first new year's kiss for my friend's hot cousin which was funny. We initially had bonded over sharing the same name which doesn't happen often since I have a less common, kinda old-fashioned name. Anyways, not too long after that my memory got a little more spotty but I didn't fully black out which is a plus. We left around 2:30 or so and made it back to her apartment in Manhattan around 3:15 or something around then. New Year day was spent mostly in bed. I got up around 1 but it wasn't until maybe 3 or slightly after that everyone was up. The hangover wasn't horrible and I avoided the headache, though the body aches weren't as forgiving.

The rest of the trip was spent mostly chilling and exploring Manhattan. It was cold, windy, and with one of my friends being sick, we couldn't do too much which was fine by me. It was nice to be able to do have some fun outside of Virginia before heading back to DC.

*                               *                                *     

So now I have a question for you guys:

The state of things between Brandon and I has me kinda confused and doing some thinking. First, I do like the guy; it's awesome spending time with him, but I don't know if things are going where either of us want. At this point, I'm looking for more than just being cuddle buddies or friends with benefits, and I don't know if that's what he's looking for. I also think if for whatever reason our relationship did end up being more. we might be too different for each other. I know I've made a point to say how I don't want everything to be similar between me and a guy I'm interested in, but this time around, I think things might be too far apart to be workable. We don't really share friend circles, he's working, I'm still in school, and given that, we don't really get to see each other either apart from maybe once a month when we arrange our schedules. In addition, our interests don't really overlap. Sure, we share a love for the Redskins and such, but there isn't anything we can both get really excited about. We aren't even really talking nearly as often now, and my major pet peeve - ignoring texts - is too common.

I don't know if people have gotten past this sort of thing and how they do it, but I'm seriously starting to think if I really should continue fretting over this. School's starting soon which is going to bring its own brand of stress inevitably. Also, what's worse, being woefully single or being in a relationship where uncertainty of where things stand rules? Going back to school soon could be a good "fresh start". Granted, my last two years at my school haven't exactly made me very excited about the prospects there, but hey, maybe some new people have come out of the woodwork (no pun intended) and there's the new freshman population to terrorize look into if I really have to.

I know you guys don't have all the details but do you have an opinion on this situation? Should I try and talk to him and see what the whole picture is like from his side, or just accept that maybe things are cooling down and let things happen?

All the best,

JP