Dear 21 year old JP,
You did it, bud. You did it. You're just over one month away from graduating from college - I'm so damn happy for you. You worked hard, you had fun, and you accomplished something many only dream about. You're about to go into the "real world" and I know you're scared. It's ok. That's 100% normal and you will learn soon that being scared and uncertain is just a part of life. Over the next 6 years, you will see and learn so many things and some of it will be scary. You will be nervous and have to face new challenges, push yourself, and step way, way outside your comfort zone. I know you don't like those moments now and hell, you won't like them in 6 years either, but these are the times and challenges that you need to grow. You got this.
This coming month is going to be an exciting time - cherish every second of it. Whether you realize it or not, you will lose touch with many of the people you see every day today. It won't be out of spite, anger, or malice, but just the sheer nature of growing up and starting the next chapter of your life. Take time to say "hi" to these people - it's a small but kind thing to do. Don't worry too much though, some of your closest friends will still be there six years from now. E, Alex, your still pretty new boyfriend, they and many others will all be there and you will still be friends with them many years from now.
You are probably also consumed with getting ready for what comes next - graduation, your last two finals, your new job - and yes, that is important, but right now, I want you to go out, have a beer, see your friends, chat with the staff of the LGBTQ Center, and just take a walk around campus. You will miss this place more than you think. It's important to make those memories now so you can look fondly back at all the great times, fun times, and sometimes messy times of being a student and seeing the world as your oyster.
Here's 10 things I want you to do in the next week. Yes, some of it may feel weird, but trust me, it'll be fun.
- Get that booth in the off campus bar and order a few pitchers with your friends
- Make that loaf of monkey bread for your housemates - they will still be talking about that for years to come
- Go to Town, see a drag show, and dance your heart out and stay out way too late - in a few years it will be gone, but the memories will last
- Stop being so damn fussy about drag shows - I know you're still obsessed about trying to come across as masc and "not like those other gays" - it's not a good look. Have fun, let go, and don't worry so much about what others think.
- Host that dinner party and throw that house party - yeah, you can cook well, and it will only become a greater passion of yours in the future. You also know how to throw a hell of a party, and yes, Svedka will do.
- Don't worry about Brandon, he will be fine and is living his best life. Cherish the memories and the time you spent with him. He helped craft who you are (and also your enduring love for Coors Light) as good people do
- Eat that extra slice of pizza - your metabolism will never be as fast as it is now and your muscles as defined for at least the next 6 years, so indulge, you lucky 21 year old bastard
- Don't be afraid to tell your boyfriend you love him, spoiler alert, you guys will still be together in 6 years and living together
- Stop comparing your job offer or how much money you make to others. You have control over your life, and fretting over it doesn't do anyone good and only hurts yourself
- Call mom and tell her you love her. You don't know it now, but she has done more than you know to make sure you made it this far and give you the opportunities you've had. She is and will always be your hero and #1 fan.
JP, I want you to know that everything is going to be ok. Actually, more than ok; it's going to be great. I don't want to spoil it for you, but if you keep up the work ethic that I know you have and fight through whatever challenges that come up, you will be successful at whatever you put your mind to once school ends. You will have a strong group of friends, a man who loves you and who you will love back, a few jobs which you will excel at, and more over the coming years. But again, today, I don't want you to think about that. I want you to live in the present. Now, text your housemates and go get a beer.
Cheers,
JP, circa 2020
