Une Vie Compliquée

Language Nerd and Study Abroad

2012-02-13T19:31:00.009-05:00

You probably need to know French to understand why this is funny.

Basically, the French have a weird and overcomplicated way of counting.

france: ten

france: twenty

france: thirty

france: forty

france: fifty

france: sixty

france:

france: sixty ten

world: france what are you do—

france: four twenties

world: france stop it

france: four twenties ten

world: france that doesn't even make any sense

france:

world:

france:

world:

france: hundred.

I'd still gladly take French's quirks over German's horrid word-order and inconsistent assigning of genders to nouns (so bad....). #languagenerdproblems #iknowthisisnottwitter

In other news, my study abroad application is due tomorrow and I'm currently in freak out mode. I got my passport style photos taken today, got my dean to sign off on my course list, and all my paperwork except for editing my personal statement is done. Oh my god this is actually happening.....

JP

Lame

2012-02-11T21:16:00.002-05:00

Sometimes I really wonder why I even bother trying to organize and coordinate things with people. More often than not, they simply change their minds last minute or provide some craptastic, lame excuse to get out of it. I know this sounds all petty and shit but sometimes....

Yeah, I busted out the .gif file

Vous vous prenez pour qui?

Tease

2012-02-05T00:40:00.001-05:00

Hey guys, it's been a while but I'm glad to report things are going pretty smoothly here in DC. With classes in full swing, I've finally gotten a better picture of the professors I'm dealing with and also the classes themselves. I've come to realize that I really enjoy marketing and macroeconomics a lot. Marketing is really interesting and fun subject that, while being bashed by many business schoolers, is actually one of the best courses I've taken so far. The professor also could be gay as I've discussed with one my my friends who is in my class. He's also not half bad looking haha. Macro has also surprised me with how fun it's been. Compared to microecon, which was the bane of my existence last year partially due to a lacklustre professor, macro is infinitely more understandable and practical. My finance class has also been really cool so far. Considering I'm planning for finance to be one of my majors, I really hoped that I like the class, and I'm glad to report I am. My professor is kind of crazy, he likes to bash on state schools in a joking manor but he weaves in personal experiences and actually makes participating easy. Somehow, that man has made calculating the values of annuities, perpetuities and Future values...fun. Scary. As for my other classes, International trade has been relatively smooth; it's difficult to say the least but I'm grasping the concepts in class. German has been German, I found out that I likely won't be able to take German while abroad so this might be my last semester which is sad but not devastating as ending French was for me a few years back.

Aside from classes, school life has been pretty good. Friend drama has been playing out as normal with friend/enemy relations being formed and broken as often as the sun rises and sets. Honestly, I try to avoid it as much as possible since I have better things to do than get involved in crap that will only hurt me in the long run. I've also kept up with my resolution to go to the gym 3-5 times a week, mostly with the motivation of my friend Liz who comes with me. We just tell each other we need to be ready for shirtless volleyball on the front lawn once Spring comes around.

* * *

This past Friday was the first day I actually made time to indulge myself in some well deserved me-time. After my class ended at 11, I took a nap and then around 2 went to the Washington Auto Show at the convention center. Last year was the first time that I missed the show since I started going when I was 10 so I was determined to go this time. The show was pretty good; there were a fair amount of concept cars out there but nothing really blew my mind except for a few. I sat in some of the few models that are brand new or that I'd been wanting to for a while, like the Audi S7, 2013 Lexus GS, Range Rover Evoque, and the Fiat 500. I even got to ride in a 500 in a handling course they set up in the convention center itself. It was really sick. Here's some pics from the show:

The Lexus LF-LC concept, probably the car I wanted to see most at the show. It's stunning

A Ford Concept

The Domestic makers

The Fiat 500 Gucci Edition. They took an already accessory type car, and made it even more of a fashion tool.

Last night I also went out clubbing for the first time this year. After pregaming at a friend's apartment, we grabbed a cab and went to to Towne, a gay club near Howard University and U-St in DC. I had never been to this club before but had heard good things so I was really excited to go. The place was surprisingly spacious and there were gogo dancers(!) The music was also really good. When I'm drunk it really like to dance, especially to more pop-type music with a good beat which they had plenty of. I hung out with a group of my friends for a while then started dancing with a few of the the other guys.

The first guy I danced with was from AU; he was also a sophomore and was dressed really preppy with a sweater over a shirt and tie which was strange but also kinda hot. We grinded for a while but then we started doing some crazy crap with his body undulating and moving in ways that I had never seen or experienced before. It was crazy and kind of intimidating, I even lost my balance once because of his moves. Long story short, he was a a boatload of fun. After that guy, I went back to my group and noticed a guy close by who kept looking over at me. He was really good looking, slightly taller than me, dirty blond hair, and beautiful, soft blue eyes. I eventually moved my way over to him and we introduced ourselves and chatted. He graduated from the school I'm currently attending in 2010 and also did the business school. He majored in International business and OPIM and even was involved in one of the top acapella groups on campus. He's from California where he works for Google now which is a company that I wouldn't mind working for too when I graduate. All in all, he had pretty much all the characteristics I look for in a guy, both physical and mental. We even danced for a while and before I left, I got the courage to ask for his number. We texted back and forth for a bit after I left the club too. What sucks is though is that I know in all likelihood I will never see him again. It was such a tease for life to deal me such a card. I talked to Liz about it and she said not to give up, that things happen for a reason and maybe our paths will cross again so hey, maybe I'll run into him in my travels one day. Viewed as a whole, Friday was a very solid day in my book.

On Saturday, I went home to spend an evening with Maria because her birthday is coming up. We spent a night relishing each other's company by seeing Beauty and the Beast in 3-D and getting Korean food. Seeing the movie made me realize how much I loved old Disney movies. They were surprisingly well made and had a great story and music. Yeah, the tickets were expensive but it was totally worth it. Last night also made me realize just how much I love living where I do. I know this whole "home is where the heart is" stuff is scoffed at, but really, when I do plan on settling down, my first stop would be to find a house back in Northern Virginia and raise my family there. It has everything I need and more. I think I will turn this into a full post soon even since it takes more than just this small paragraph to explain what I'm trying to say.

Alright, this is getting lengthy so I'm going to cut it here. I hope you have a properly lazy Sunday and a productive, drama-free week.

All the best,

JP

Video: Hybrid Power

2012-01-27T20:58:00.000-05:00

This is the new Toyota TS030 Hybrid LeMans racecar...and it sounds fucking epic. It's like if a pod racer from Starwars and the Batmobile had a lovechild, this would be the result. Damn.

Some People

2012-01-26T03:19:00.000-05:00

There are three main groups of people in my life: those who I get along with, those who I don't, and those who I don't even bother with. Luckily for me, the number of people that fall into each of those groups declines as one goes down the line. For the most part, I'm a friendly and agreeable person; people get along with me and I with them. One reason for this I think is because I will go out of my way to make friends and get to know someone from the get-go. Even if I have no idea about someone, I will try and find some common ground between us two and form some kind of connection on the spot. Through this, I have met many people who I was on good terms with. Today, whether I still see them or am still in contact with them varies, but despite that, the fact that I know they have positive opinion of me and I of them makes me happy.

The second, smaller group of people tends to be people, who despite my attempts to find common ground, still possess qualities which I personally oppose and likely will not ever grow to love or at least become apathetic towards. Despite that however, I still want to engage these people because they can provide a wide range of insight towards topics and ideas that I probably know very little about. Even if I believe X and them Y, I want to hear what they say even if I don't like it because even controversial or disliked knowledge is useful knowledge, and as curious and inquisitive creatures, humans can always benefit from knowing more.

Like Republicans

They say keep your friends close, but your enemies closer, well, here is a case where I think this applies. I probably have had the most engaging conversations with those who I personally don't like but can't laud enough on what they can and have contributed to my personal development.

Finally, we have the third group, people who I don't bother with. This is a very exclusive club in my social sphere network as it only contains two people from my 19+ years on this earth. The individuals who belong in this group are those who possess qualities which I feel are so ludicrous, so abhorrent and unforgivable, that no matter what they say or do, I will never have any sort of respect for them as fellow humans.

It may seem like a very strong thing to say that someone can be so nasty and curt that I hold no respect for them in my mind, yet it is true. Despite being as open I attempt to be, there are those who I just cannot seem to get along with or respectfully disagree with. One of these individuals was a girl back in middle school who thankfully I only knew for two years before she disappeared to a different high school, went to live on some hippie farm, and now is at some joke of a college that I had never heard of up north.

I bet she grew some sick acorn squash at one point

She was an absolutely deplorable person in my eyes; a veritable banshee if there ever was one. I remember not so fondly that for two long years, I tried to be friends with her, tried to be nice and kind, yet all of this was pointless. She constantly put down very idea I shared, didn't bother to reciprocate any act of kindness I threw her way or try to even feign any form of friendship. So I did what I had to do: I stopped giving a fuck about her and dropped her from my life. Not to long ago, I saw her at a local restaurant while I was dining with some friends. I couldn't help but feel so warm on the the inside, knowing that I cut her out of my life so long ago. She was excess baggage that I didn't need way back when and still don't need today. If I could, I would give my 8th grade self a massive high-five for his smart decision.

The second individual who falls in this category is someone who I had the displeasure of meeting more recently and had even ranted about back in October of last year; we'll name him Ted. Ted is a guy who I met back during my freshman year of college. He lived on my floor in my freshman dorm and worked his way into one of my close circles of friends. Like I did with the others, I entered this relationship with an open mind, but little did I realize that even that would not be enough. Ted has one of those personalities that just does not mesh well with mine. While there are plenty of people who I don't get along perfectly with, I can still manage to find a way for things to fit and work out, but between him and I, we're like oil and water. He's a crass, unapologetically rude, and all-around disagreeable person in my mind. This guy has been enemies with almost everyone in my close circle at one point or another, but somehow, things sort themselves out; for me, however, this just never was the case. Maybe it's how he must ways go against the grain and say something controversial, racist, homophobic or any combination thereof just to go against the flow of a conversation, or maybe it's how he holds grudges about the most trivial and silly things for all of eternity and can never let things go. No matter what the reason, he's someone who I genuinely can not, and probably never will get along with. A fun part of this however is that he seems to dislike me as equally as I do him...

I've tried to be the bigger person and be kind to him on the rare occasions I do see him, but none of this has ever been reciprocated. Every time I say "hi", try to congratulate him, or just be friendly is greeted with a troll-like grimace and face longer than the Nile in Egypt.

Even this photo is kinda generous...

I still hold some hope that things maybe can work out, but that hope is quickly fading. Funny thing is that he's in a relationship with a girl in one of my circles who I'm not super close with but is still one of my friends. I don't understand how she can stand him but that's a mystery for another day. Nevertheless, wherever he ends up in life, likely far as he can absorb knowledge like a sponge, I wish him whatever life gives him. I don't wish him the best in life because I don't believe people who purposefully try to be disagreeable deserve the best. No matter what, however, I look forward to a time when the even limited interaction I have with him now eventually dries up to nothing. Like the previous girl, he's the kind of person who just weighs me down and provides excess baggage that I just don't need. Until then, I'll just smile and wave until I reach the day when I can quietly say to myself "Good Riddance."

All the best,

JP

Calm Down

2012-01-21T18:18:00.001-05:00

Okay, I know that you're trying to be all independent and "I'm the master of my own ship" and stuff, but you seriously need to get a grip and stop getting all moody at the drop of a hat. Contrary to whatever you're thinking in your head, the world isn't conspiring against you.

Seriously,

Sophomore Year Part 2

2012-01-18T20:12:00.000-05:00

I just started week two of my second semester and it looks like this will be a very busy, but interesting one. For the first time in a year I have classes five days a week, but I only have one on Friday thankfully. I'm taking German II, Marketing, Macroeconomics, International Trade, and Business Financial Management this year. All my classes ended up being spread out quite evenly throughout the week and I have time for a solid lunch and a nap if I want every day. My earliest class is German at 10 Monday ,Wednesday and Friday, otherwise my days start at 11. I pretty much finish each day around 6 so I have plenty of time for dinner and hopefully the gym as well; my goal is 3-5 times a week which is reasonable I think.

As for professors, collectively they seem like a solid bunch, but I'll give it a few more weeks before I come to any conclusions. My German professor seems nice enough, but after my professor for intro I last year, she has big shoes to fill. My Macro professor has a heavy Minnesota accent while my Marketing professor has a French-Canadian accent and drops and adds in the letter "h" in words when he is not supposed to which is pretty endearing. My I-Trade professor is kinda scatterbrained which I hope won't hurt me too much since that is one class I need to do well in. I'm hoping he's just nervous or something, otherwise we're going to have a problem. I just need to do well in general this semester since the business school curve and classes which I honestly didn't care much for first semester made me take a hit to my GPA which I'm not too happy about.

Since coming back to school, I've also gotten the ball rolling on my study abroad plans for Fall of my junior year. I hope to study in Copenhagen, Denmark if I get into the program I want. I started doing research last semester and decided on it since it let me take the business courses I needed and also allowed me the greatest freedom in exploring Europe. If all goes well, me and two of my close friends will all be going to Denmark in Fall which would be so sick. The past week or so, I've been getting all my forms in order, I contacted the two professors who I wanted to do my recommendation (my German and Management professors from last semester) and set up a meeting with my study abroad advisor so everything will be in order. I know the program I'm going for is pretty competitive so I really hope I get in. I really want to do a lot of work in Europe so this would really help me get a taste of what's in store for my future if I get accepted.

Outside of class, I'm still doing publicity work for some of the theatre groups on campus. The show I'm currently working on is premiering in less than a month so I'll have plenty of work organizing the cast and the rest of the production staff soon. I also got asked to be publicity director for the university theatre department's production of Macbeth this Spring which is a huge opportunity for me to prove myself and gain some major credibility and resume points. Grilling Society is still on pause for the winter, at least until the first snow fall which, upsettingly, we still haven't had in the D.C. area. I sure as hell hope something big is in store for us since this has been a pretty pathetic winter so far.

Alright, well, I need to get caught up on my readings so I'll leave you guys now. Sorry for the inconsistent posting, I'll try and get to a more regular and frequent schedule soon once things settle down here.

All the best,

JP

Shit Girls Say to Gay Guys

2012-01-12T00:05:00.001-05:00

I facepalmed so many times during this video my forehead is now red....mostly out of embarrassment about things that have been said to me as well.

Yeah, he pretty much hit the nail on the head with this one.

Thankfully, none of my friends have had me feel them up...at least so far.

JP

I'm a Creep

2012-01-09T22:40:00.002-05:00

I'm using the bike at the gym as I write this so I apologize for this post being rather short and for any terrible iPod touch autocorrects that I didn't catch.

My winter break is winding down and I'm returning back to campus tomorrow for the start of the spring semester. I'm really looking forward to seeing everyone an seeing how break was for them. I'll post an update about all the stuff that has gone on in the past week or so soon enough; trust me, there's plenty it talk about.

Anyways, the reason I'm writing this post is because I've come to realize I can be a Grade A creep at times. The gym I go to at home is two floors with a balcony looking over the main floor. Since I make a habit of going at night, I usually see a regular group of people who make a habit of going around the same time I do. One of these people however is this really hot jacked guy who is here maybe Hal the times I'm here. Now, when I say hot, I mean he could be cast to play Zeus or Poseidon in The Immortals sequel right now and fit the role perfectly. This guy gives Greek Demi-god Kellan Lutz a run for his money and biceps for that matter. The reason I'm on the bikes right now is because the bikes look over the freeweight section of the gum perfectly and I get to watch him in all his perfectly chiseled goodness.

Oh my lord, his....everything

I tell myself I admire his physique as a means of motivating myself to get ready and toned for the spring...but I know on the inside that the real reason is because I'm a creep.

Hey, there's nothing wrong with some innocent fun.

All the best,

JP

Happy 2012

2012-01-02T20:23:00.000-05:00

Hey Y'all, first, a belated Happy New Year to you! I hope you had a good time however you spent that night. I spent new years with Christine, Mads and our friend Paige who's visiting from California at Christine's house. We had a fondue dinner which was really awesome since I haven't done fondue since probably freshman year of high school. First was a cheese fondue with vegetables, bread and apple followed by NY Strip Steak fondue with a nice beef stock, and finally was chocolate fondue with strawberries, cookies and marshmallows. Dinner was with Christine's mom, step dad, stepsister and some rando who we guessed was her Step dad's nephew but weren't sure haha. He was kinda silly and liked to talk, not half bad looking either. We had a bet rolling as to how old we thought he was, I ended up settling on 24 with Paige and Christine and Mads set on 25. Eventually we pried out that he graduated in 2009 so 25 was more likely. He was from the Midwest, Indiana I think, and had an accent which I'm a sucker for.

After dinner, we took pictures and settled down for the countdown to midnight. We ended up having what we mutually described as a very high-school night. Since it was at Christine's house, we couldn't get drunk like for 2011 which was kinda a letdown; nevertheless, it was a really fun night. We watched The Walking Dead, an AMC show on Netflix before midnight and gorged ourselves on kettle corn, chips and french onion dip, and vegan general tso's chicken from Whole Foods (odd, but surprisingly good). At midnight, we did our cheers with Martinelli's and I made my calls and texts to my friends. Soon after we settled back down to our couch party and started watching Horrible Bosses which I saw before but definitely didn't mind watching again. We all were planning on spending the night so we each got a blanket and made ourselves comfortable for the night. By 1:30ish, I fell asleep in my chair along with Paige who had a sleeping bag on the floor. Christine and Mads watched the entire thing and found it really funny as they said the next morning at breakfast. Christine's mom made us pancakes and bacon (can I say I love this family?) and we had a leisurely morning. Christine had work that day so we all left by 10:30.

So, overall, a pretty chill new year. It was nice to spend time with good, long-term friends, be totally relaxed and just vege out, so underrated in my opinion.

Well, I still have about one week left in my winter break so I've got a few adventures planned out. Maria just got back and my friend M should be returning from her trip up to Boston in the next few days so I look forward to catching up with them soon.

I hope 2012 brings many great surprises to you.

All the best,

JP

Head West: A Spontaneous Road Trip

2011-12-29T22:21:00.005-05:00

Hey dudes, hope your week has been going well.

First a little Christmas recap. This year, Christmas was simple, low-key and fun, at my house just the way I like it pretty much. I got lots o' moolah which is always useful and we had our hot pot dinner. I gorged myself on lamb and shrimp and promptly went into a food coma afterwards. Cousin A, my cousin on my dad's side of the family, got me an iPad which is extraordinarily generous albeit unecessary but nobody in their right mind would say no. Thing is, I'm worried I'm going to either lose it, break it or both at school so my mom is now the owner of the new toy. I want to get myself a Kindle Fire after Amazon updates the software in a few months anyways. I set it up for her and now all she's been doing is playing spider solitaire, Bejewled and watching Brothers and Sisters on Netflix in her spare time. I really need to get her more apps that will actually put the thing to good use though. That piece of tech has so much potential it would be shame not to use all of what it can give y'know? This year I ended up forgoing the jewlery or roses which I've done for the past few years and instead gave her and my aunt gift certificates for a mani/pedi at a local spa so they can go together some time. She seemed to enjoy it, so hopefully she'll find some time to use it.

A few days after Christmas, I had a quick reunion with my friend Mad and Christine who I've been hanging out with for a few days now. Maria is out of the country visiting family so I haven't seen her yet unfortunately. We got lunch at Noodles and Co and caught up on school, life, guys and such. I also got myself some peppermint bark from Mad as a belated gift which was pretty sick. I also finally got a long overdue haircut.

Not bad I think

Overall, break has been pretty low-key and chill. Good stuff.

* * * * *

A little while ago I wrote a post called "Head West" which you can read here here where I wrote about how I wanted to drive into the unknown and escape from the familiar. I've always wanted to do something spontaneous; mysteries are always thrilling for me. Well, this morning, with no real plans for the day, I decided to act on impulse, so I decided to go for a nice long drive out west.

I left home around 1 this afternoon and started out west. I jumped on 66-West towards Front Royal, a sleeply little town by the Shennandoah Valley, which ultimately was my final destination. I hadn't gone to the Appalachians since I was in elementary school for whatever reason so I forgot just how different Virginia gets outside of the DC metro area. First, where I'm from, the landscape is as flat as board so it was fun to be reminded that the state actually has some different geographical features.

Look Ma, weather eroded Ordovician-period rock formations!

It took an hour or so to reach Front Royal but the scenery entertained me enough. Hills with derelict grain silos, the occasional tractor on a side-road and sleepy country shops dotted the highway. It wasn't anything truly special, considering you could see mostly the same scenery accross most of the semi-rural US but it was a nice change from the congested roads and high-rises of home. After an hour, I finally reached the town of Front Royal...and promptly missed the exit because ~~I'm a dumbass~~ I was too thrilled by the landscape. I got off at the next, even smaller town named Chester-something which didn't even have a stoplight and looped my way back around. Eventually I found myself in Front Royal and decided to take a break and stretch at a local shopping center. There, I saw two things that got me a little too excited because they are things I hate to love but do anyways because I'm a a southern boy on the inside - A Cracker Barrel and A Wal-Mart Supercenter.

I pissed myself out of chicken-n-dumplings happiness

I don't like admitting it but Cracker Barrel, despite how common it is in most of the American South, is a place that I love a little too much. It's heavy, dense, massive-portioned Southern goodness that I imagine what eating a hug from grandma would feel like. We have none of these within a reasonable distance from my home or school so finding one makes be a little too excited.

You can also feel the discount-goods excitement I'm giving off

In the same place was a Wal-Mart Supercenter which I haven't seen since I last drove down to Florida a few years ago. I swore that you would only find these in the South and midwest but I guess I was wrong. It was really funny walking in because A. I was dressed better than almost everyone there and B. I was the only Asian person for probably a 20 mile radius so I got some funny looks. The people of the area are nothing like the crowd from where I grew up; lots more camo, hunting gear and redneck goodness than I'm used to to say the least. Also, there are a lot more pickup trucks.

Afterwards I ended up driving downtown which was pretty much how I pictured a mountain town would look like. Lot's of older, wooden buildings and also a really cool building with a bunch of old painted ads on the side; I saw one for Coca-Cola and another for something like "Benson's Seltzer - Take for Headaches" which I thoght was really cool. The building looked like it used to be part of a row of buildings since it also had some bricked-up windows on the sides but now only short more modern buildings flank it. What was really cool though was going down East Main Street which was still all decorated for the holidays and lined with these really old fashioned brick buildings which made it feel like I was going back a few decades in time. The traffic was too stop and go for me to get a good picture though.

By 4 or so, I started heading back which was fun for a few reasons. First was seeing this car in front of me...

It had a huge pair of silver balls

...and also the fact that rural roads let me go so much faster when driving. Usually I'm stuck topping around 70 or so because of police and traffic but out there, it was clear roads so straight I couldn't help but indulge my right foot a little.

And that was just cruising speed.

I also played leapfrog with this SUV from Georgia who kept passing me and then me passing him when we had ot change lanes because of a slower driver in the lane. It was a little too fun probably but the roads were straight and I was paying attention. I ended up getting back a good bit quicker than when I was going over. In the end, I drove a total of about 150 miles and finished my trip with a clear head. I think it would be pretty cool to do something like that again some time and maybe go into Maryland or south instead of west.

I've been wanting to just go for a drive for the heck of it and I was glad I finally did. It cleared my head, gave me something to do and I got to explore somewhere I haven't been to before. I look forward to doing it again some time.

Enjoy your weekend!

All the best,

JP

Merry Christmas

2011-12-24T23:41:00.000-05:00

Merry Christmas Everyone.

I hope you have a great day full of laughter with those you love.

Darlene Love - Christmas (Baby Please Come Home) Live on Letterman, 2011

All the best,

JP

Christmas Traditions

2011-12-22T02:06:00.002-05:00

Being a first-generation child of an immigrant family, I got to experience many things my parents and even a few of my cousins never were able to for at least some substantial portion of their lives. One of these things is celebrating Christmas.

First and foremost, they way we celebrate Christmas in my house isn't for the same reasons as many other do. Since we aren't a religious family, Christmas always meant something different. For us, Christmas was about family, food, gift giving and listening to Mariah Carey belt to "All I Want for Christmas is You" on the radio. Of course, many other families celebrate Christmas for the same reasons we do, but often it is in conjunction with some religious background like the birth of Jesus and the like. What my parents tried to do was to provide as "authentic" of an America experience for me as possible, and that meant Christmas was high on the list.

Since I'm an only child, I will admit to having a spoiled Christmas experience when it comes to my life as a whole. For example, when I was 15, I had an obsession with guitar even though I had never played one in my entire life. I begged for an electric guitar and I got one, it was a gift from my aunts. Well, long story short, let's just say it never really left the box and today still sits in the basement. In the four years since that day, my love for guitar has waned and the only use I see for it is to maybe mount it on the wall as some decorative piece of art but that I feel would just be wrong and the music gods will strike me down for a. quitting the violin after six years and b. degrading what is a really nice instrument. As the years have passed however, I've gotten harder to shop for and the pair of shoes, sweater, video game or whatnot that would have been perfect four or five years ago now has simply become money in the red envelopes most Asians would be familiar with.

You might be thinking, "JP, are you honestly complaining about getting money!?", to which I respond, not, not really. Yes, it's practical, it's always gets the job done and it gives me the freedom to buy whatever I would like but there's something missing. One of my favorite Christmas day traditions from when I was little was being able to rip open boxes covered in wrapping paper and solving the mystery of what was hiding inside the colourful packages underneath the tree for the past week. It felt magical in the way I think only small children and those who still feel like a kid on the inside could understand.

While presents always did play a starring role on Christmas day, it was always the family dinner that I looked forward to. Apart from Thanksgiving, Christmas was and still is one of the few opportunities I have to see most of my family at one time. We either stay home with my mom and aunts all cooking something as we all sit at the big dining table or we go out to a restaurant together. Even though Christmas dinner isn't nearly as lengthy, boisterous or grand compared to Thanksgiving, I almost like it more since it was so casual and comfortable. This year we're staying in and having dinner at home. We're doing hot pot which looks something like this:

Yummmm

Basically, there's a pot of boiling stock in the middle and you take raw meat, veggies, seafood, whathaveyou and cook it in the boiling broth. Then you fish it out, dip it in a sauce and eat it. It's a very communal, winter specific style of dining which is really fun to try if you ever get the chance. We've been doing this for the past few years and is one of my favorite Christmas traditions that I look forward to once I'm on winter break.

Last year, I also wanted to try something new so I got a gingerbread house kit that I built with my mom. It turned out pretty nice so this year I got another one, this time a Christmas tree gingerbread kit that I finished tonight. It turned out better than I expected. It's takes some time to build and it's repetitive but it's surprisingly relaxing which is why I think I like it so much (this might also explain why I like vacuuming and cooking). I'm hoping to turn this gingerbread thing into a tradition too.

Success!

With Christmas only a few days away, I still have lots of shopping and baking to do. Being broke for the most part, I'm making bacon shortbread cookies with chocolate ganache for my friends instead of buying gifts. If you think bacon on a backed good sounds gross, I dare you to try something like it and say that afterwards. Bacon+anything is delicious...just sayin'.

What kind of traditions do you/your family have for Christmas?

All the best,

JP

Sexy Nerds

2011-12-20T12:39:00.003-05:00

I've explained my love of nerdy, dorky guys before and well, I've found a video that pretty much exemplifies every single fantasy I've ever had...

Best line from this video?

I be sexy strippin'
while he be JavaScriptin'.
We can read science fiction
while we make science friction.

Jonny McGovern - Sexy Nerd

I know, those guys have bodies like no nerd, or for that matter many people I've ever seen, but that doesn't mean they're not out there ;)

Jonny McGovern, you're a genius.

**I've added a contact email on the sidebar in case you would like to contact me personally for whatever reason**

Video: Party Rockin in Pyongyang

2011-12-19T17:37:00.000-05:00

Okay, so maybe this isn't completely appropriate right now but I get the feeling there are few Kim Jong-Il sympathizers out there.

I guess the beloved leader partied a little too hard Saturday

JP

Winter Break

2011-12-18T23:07:00.001-05:00

Woo Hoo! I'm finally done with finals. Overall they went okay but I'm still nervous about getting the results and seeing the final grades for all my classes. I know I got a B+ in my Intro to German class and an A- on my final so I'm really happy about that. I don't want to know my grades in my other classes though, they're pretty much all hanging on how I did on the finals.

After I finished my last final Friday I had dinner with Liz and our friend Ann who is leaving at the end of the semester. I promised her lamb curry freshman year and I finally came through on that promise and we had our final dinner together. I wish we could have had a more fun last gathering but since finals were still in full swing we had to keep it low key.

Saturday I spent a day getting ready to go home. I did loads of laundry and cleaned up the room a bit. That night, I had a trip to the White House with the LGBT resource center which was actually pretty cool. There was a lottery about three weeks ago which I won so I was one of the 20 people to be lucky enough to go. At the event, I saw a few people I knew including one guy who I didn't know I was gay, we'll call him Joe. He's involved in theatre and is friends with some of my other friends so I knew him through association beforehand. He's really tall, has blond/brown hair and is on the slim/fit side. We chatted in the hotel lobby and then during the tour of the White House itself (there were so many Christmas trees....like at least two per room). The tour was self guided with some people explaining unique decorations and such...overall, pretty nice. On the way back me and Joe shared a cab and I suggested that we should hang out some time after break which he agreed to. He's kinda dorky, cute and not typically the kind of guy I'm attracted to but hey, let's see where this goes.

Now that I'm finally home, I'm so happy to have my car, a kitchen and familiar surroundings back around me. My mom and I put up the Christmas lights outside the house and did general errands like going to Costco and stuff, and despite how banal that sounds, I actually enjoyed it quite a lot. Tomorrow I plan to hit up some of my favorite restaurants and see some friends who I haven't seen since the Summer so nothing too exciting. Pretty much, I'm just happy to be home.

I have some opinion pieces/topical posts in the work so look for them to be posted soon.

All the best,

JP

Procrastination Chronicles #4

2011-12-14T03:08:00.000-05:00

Serving Size: 12 Gummy Bears

Hah! Serving sizes are for losers. Go big or go home.

Yeah, I'm slowly going insane.

Procrastination Chronicles #3

2011-12-12T14:55:00.001-05:00

I have my first final tomorrow and then at least one every day after that. I wish finals would at least take me out to dinner and a movie before it fucks me. How rude of it.

I'm at that point right now where I'm kinda terrified/feel totally unprepared and also really wanting to just go home and run away from it all.

Things I'm missing hardcore right now:

My Dog

Home Cooked Chinese Food

My Friends

...and my mom (no, not in any way representative of her in real life. I just found it hilarious)

Ugh, less than a week until this hell is done...at least until May.

JP

Procrastination Chronicles #2

2011-12-11T14:17:00.001-05:00

Evening MBAs need to get those sticks out of their pretentious asses. You're fucking evening MBAs and we have just as much of a right to this building as you do.You have no right to tell us to be quiet when 1. we got to the room first, 2. you were being just as loud 5 minutes ago and 3. When you were obvioculy not exactly "doing work" five seconds ago.

Get your inflated egos and stinky food out of this room.

Assholes.

Procrastination Chronicles #1

2011-12-09T23:09:00.000-05:00

What I like to think

The reality of it all

Make it stop >.<

To All My Hokies Out There

2011-12-08T19:23:00.003-05:00

My thoughts and prayers are with you all this evening. I have too many friends there to not feel affected by this tragedy. Stay Strong.
Much love to you all

JP

Brace Yourselves...

2011-12-07T23:01:00.000-05:00

...Finals are here.
Today was my last day of classes and that means that it's less than a week until finals begin. My first final is next Tuesday and then I have one every day until Thursday which I have a double Managerial Accounting and German final. I'm just trying to take things one day at a time right now. I have a study schedule set up for the rest of this week and the weekend and I'm ready with coffee and snacks in tow. I even bought a new mattress pad so I can sleep better; my bed feels like a cloud now. Hopefully I can stick to this schedule and it will pay off but in the mean time, I'm probably going to be MIA for the rest of the week so I apologize ahead of time.

It feels like this semester went by much more quickly than last semester. I think it's because I know my place, have my friends and all that stuff so the days didn't feel nearly as long as they did before. It's nice but also bittersweet because that means an entire semester of my college life is done. I love it here so much that I want it to last and right now I feel that before I know it, I'll be graduating and leaving into the real world which I really don't want to do. Is it bad to say I want to stay being a kid for the rest of my life?

In other news, I've been hired to be publicity director for one of the theatre group's production of The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee which has been pretty cool overall. It definitely feels different than the student-written one-acts festival I worked on earlier this year but I have high hopes for it. I went to a design run and saw the first half of it or so and it is hilarious so I can't wait for the final product. I also got hired to do publicity for the department's production of Macbeth come spring which I'm looking forward to.

I've also been promoted to Grill Tender in the grilling club I'm a part of this past week. This gets me one step closer to the Grill Master position I'm trying to reach by the end of the semester this coming spring. The new board just got sworn in at this past week's anniversary party. The club's been called such a bro fest but I actually kind of like it; the people are really cool and what guy doesn't like grilled meat?

Alright, so since I'll be out for probably at least another week, save for the occasion where I feel the need to blog as a means to procrastinate, I've done some internet searching to keep things kinda interesting here.

Here's some songs, videos and other interesting things.

Breathe Carolina - Blackout

Science Rocks

10 points for understanding this.

And finally, the photo I have on the sidebar is kinda out of season so I'm changing it. Yay!

Stay warm and enjoy your weekend.

All the best,

Video: It's Time

2011-11-30T11:35:00.002-05:00

Beautiful

Playing Straight

2011-11-26T18:06:00.001-05:00

So apart from telling my mom a few years ago, I have yet to come out to my family, and once again this year at Thanksgiving, I got a wonderful reminder of this from my cousins J and N. These two guys, my elders by about 10 years, are the two golden boys of the family (with me being the admitted rising third in family lore). They have made names of themselves at their jobs, make shit tons of money ($100K+ each) but still have not punched out any kids yet. Luckily, my aunts still think I'm young enough to not have to pester about getting a girlfriend but I can feel it coming like Lindsey Lohan can feel her next parole violation coming. Back on point though, Thanksgiving is the one time of year I get to hear J and N talk girls non stop for about 4 hours straight while I eat and awkwardly get pulled into conversation. This year however, I got pulled into conversation more than I was expecting, and I learned quite a few things about myself by bluffing my way through all the questions.

My kind of girl apparently...don't hate, Mila is hot as hell. (but more on that in a bit)

Here's a recap with all the fantastic terminology intact:

-I like girls for their legs rather than their ass or tits, but if I had to choose a second, I would take tits

-I much prefer brunettes but blonds aren't out of the question (mostly true in real life)

-I like preppy girls. not slutty and totally bangable Eastern European chicks

-I lost my virginity to a brunette (false, dirty blond) girl (false, boy) who was shorter than me (false, taller), had medium tits (N/A), was skinnier than me (false, but I'm on the skinny side), and was a "7" (I'll say True).

-I occasionally like sluts (I can be a slut myself at times)

-Mila Kunis is my type of Hollywood girl (She is hot a fuck though, I won't deny that one bit)

So yeah, fun stuff. I never knew I liked all these things but apparently I do. Granted I did have plenty of opportunities to say I was gay (including J saying how being gay is just fine in his books once during conversation) but I'd rather save that for another day. My cousins must have the worst gaydar ever.

I hope you guys had a wonderful Thanksgiving if you're from the states. I'll catch on more stuff soon, but right now my priority is to punch out a paper for that Personal Identity class that I ~~love~~ hate with the deepest passions of my heart. Before I go though, can I say the movie Immortals is SICK. Me and a few of my Friends had a bros night out and saw the movie and it was so cool. Yeah, the ratings sucked but I can't say no to 1. Movies with a basis in Greek mythology, 2. violence and gore, 3. epic battle scenes, and 4. Kellan Lutz and Henry Cavill ('nuff said). If you're into movies like that like I am, I highly recommend it.

Yes.

Also, another really hot guy, Grant Gustin, the guy who plays Sebastian, the new gay guy after Blaine on Glee is so freaking pretty it hurts. He needs more airtime. now.

Double yes.

Alright guys, enjoy the rest of your weekend. I'll try and get a full update on what's been going on in my life soonish. I promise.

All the best,

JP

Thanksgiving

2011-11-21T19:29:00.000-05:00

Yikes, so first off, sorry for not posting in over a week. Professors have been trying to cram in as much crap before Thanksgiving break as possible so I haven't had time to post anything or catch up on the blogs I follow.

But....just because I've been busy doesn't mean things haven't been interesting. On the contrary, things have been really going crazy including how there is a guy in my life now....

But until I find actual time to write a legitimate post, I'll leave you with the best Thanksgiving wishes from me to you.

All the best,

Pantsless

2011-11-11T17:24:00.004-05:00

So I spent the better part of last night at a Grilling Society party with no pants on....and tonight, I'm going "bowling with the gays" on a University Pride organized group bowling trip...

...I plan on owning all of them hehehehe.

Actually having free time leads to such good life choices.

Also, I kinda like Jessie J's new single...it's a little too Katy Perry ish for my tastes but still quite catchy.

Jessie J - Domino

On another note, I had a dream all about Mark last night and not to get me wrong, it was a great dream but I'm baffled as to why he would feature as the "lead role" in one of my dreams at this time. I woke up this morning with a very strange feeling in the pit of my stomach, kind of a mix of confusion and nostalgia. I'm probably looking too deeply into it as I often do...

Any inputs and thoughts?

Also, I've been looking for some new workout songs. I've been cycling through essentially the same playlist for the past month and a half and I'm starting to get bored. I like newer music (post 2004) and something that I can blast and keep my energy up when running/erging/lifting etc. All suggestions are greatly appreciated.

Plase excuse my extravagant use of ellipses and the word "also" in this post, I really didn't feel like thinking of other transition words.

Have a great weekend,

JP

I'm in Like with a Boy

2011-11-05T18:51:00.000-04:00

Help, I think I've Fallen in Like with a Guy...

....and worse yet, he's actually gay and there's a glimmer of hope that things have the possibility of working out if the stars align.

#gayboyproblems
#help
#youreamazingandiwantyoubutidontknowifyourereadyforarelationshipornot

that last one totally would have been rejected by Twitter...

JP

Fuck This Shit

2011-11-04T00:26:00.000-04:00

Royally screwed over by that MicroEcon midterm. And by "royally screwed" I mean I want to cry right now because I'm so fucking frustrated.

I studied for five hours a night for almost a week and none of the time and effort I put into it was worth it. Why the hell does my school take Microeconomics so seriously? It's supposed to be the joke basic-knowledge shit you take just because you need to fulfill some Liberal Arts requirement. I should have just taken it over the summer at my local State school and transferred the credit. Literally, it would have been the easiest "A" I ever would have received.

That point-buffer I built up from my first midterm is the only thing saving me right now.

An Open Letter: R

2011-11-03T01:53:00.001-04:00

Another installment of the "An Open Letter" series...

R,

You really need to get a grip on the world around you. I don't think you realize this right now but the path you're on isn't going to lead you to anything good. First is your obsession to Jackass X who I've written about on this blog before; I don't know if it's because you're craving some power figure to cling on to or just because you're trying to use him to your own advantage, but you need to realize that he isn't on your side. He makes fun of you blatantly to your face but you're so blinded by your love and faith in this guy that you don't even realize it. He's a jerk, and you're starting to show his influence on you. You're lying, exaggerating to near hyperbolic levels and being the guy that no one likes, the same guy you were making fun of just a few months ago. Your obsession with trying to gain status is also approaching unbearable levels. Stop trying to get chummy with people just because you got the idea that they will nominate you for some award later on. What happened to you? You used to be such a nice, calm, collected guy. I liked you as a friend because we were similar for the most part, but now, I don't even know what to think. You're becoming uncomfortably desperate, and it shows.

You need to end this obsession with trying to get others to like you. I don't know if it's because you've been around Jackass X too much or because of some other weird issue you've been dealing with lately. We're all your friends, and we don't want to lose you over stupid reasons. Please, just chill out. I don't know who you think is watching you every minute of every day that you're trying to impress but I can guarantee that the reward is not nearly worth the work you're putting into keeping up this act.

Just talk to us, we're your friends and we'll listen no matter what.

JP

Delilah

2011-10-30T21:41:00.001-04:00

You know that you're in need of comfort when you listen to The Delilah Show on the radio while doing homework...

Funny thing is, listening to her show is sort of a calming thing for me since I grew up listening to her on 97.1 WASH-FM during those night time car rides between my mom and dad's house. She was like some invisible aunt who was always calm, collected and had that comforting "everything will be okay" voice that made my problems disappear. Well, now that it's midterms time coupled with the stress of keeping my shit together with clubs and such, I'm actually kind of glad to be listening to her and the sappy love songs she plays.

Cheers to you, Aunt Delilah, keeping this now college student sane since the mid-nineties.

JP

www.delilah.com

Q&A Answers

2011-10-29T14:29:00.002-04:00

-Do you think you would accept a life partner right now if the right guy showed up or do you want more experience?
-I don't know honestly. If by "right now" you mean that someone comes out of nowhere and I am infatuated with him I would say no because I know things and relationships at this point in my life are so fleeting. I would say that if I do meet someone and we end up dating for a while (a couple of years "a while") then maybe. That's a bit far in the future, I still haven't had a boyfriend yet so I'll take things one step at a time haha.

-Any trustworthy friends at university you can confide in?
-I do have a few friends I do confide in at school. My go-to will always be my friend Maria even though she goes to school in a different state. Here in D.C. though, I have a small group I can talk to. My friend Jackie is very friendly, open and understanding so I confide a fair amount of things to her. Same goes for her roommate and our mutual friend Kate. I also have my friend Liz who I am very close with and have talked to about many things in the past.

-Favourite exercise?
-I'm a big erg fan. It's more of a love-hate relationship because it kicks my ass every time I use it but that's because I make it a purpose to make my erg workout on the tough side. It's probably the one biggest take away from my rowing days. Plus, I'm one of the few people who actually know how to use it which is nice.

What course do you do and what job are you intending to grab later on after it?
-I'm in the business school at my university so as of now, I'm taking Managerial Accounting and Management and Organizational Behavior. During my freshman year I took Financial Accounting, International Business and Operations and Info Management. I've also been fulfilling my Liberal Arts requirements (Psych, Sociology, English, Philosophy, Theology etc) and I'm taking German right now as well. Starting next semester/next school year, my courses will be focused on my majors which I think will be Finance and International Business with a possible minor in Psychology or Sociology. I have to declare by the end of my Spring semester so I need to decide quick haha.

Where'd the blog name come from/ howd you pick up french?
-I started French in middle school and took it until the end of the high school, so about 5 years. I started this blog back when I was still in high school and I thought a French title would be kinda fun and quirky. The title translates to "A Complicated Life" which I think reflects my life as a gay student trying to figure out his place in the world.

Do you play any games ?
-I don't know if you mean like video games or sports but I do a little of both. I'm a sucker for older games so I still play Pokémon online (the original red/blue and yellow versions) and stuff on my GameCube like Super Smash Brothers Melee, Luigi's Mansion, Mario Kart and Soul Calibur.
Occasionally I'll dive into FPS games like Halo or Call of Duty.

As for sports, I tried out sculling this past summer and I plan to get a permit to scull over the summer from the local boat house. Otherwise, I enjoy rock climbing, bowling (it's a sport!) and I want to try out archery again.

Thanks for the questions guys. If you have any more please ask away.

If you're on the East Coast, stay warm and stay safe. We're getting a few flurries here in DC but I know those of you a little further from the coast are supposed to be getting quite a bit of the white stuff.

All the best,

JP

Philosophy Classes

2011-10-25T01:27:00.001-04:00

Philosophy Courses suck. Just thought that I should throw that out there. I'm pretty people who end up majoring in philosophy end up being philosophy professors themselves and thus it's just a circular, self-perpetuating system that perpetuates a subject that just won't die like some creepy ass cockroach.

Sure, some find it interesting, but I, for better or worse, am not one of those people. Will I ever apply the meaning of Diotyma's Ladder of Love from Plato's Symposium or what Chisholm, Hume, Locke, Shoemaker or whoever else had way too much time on their hands think about personal identity in real life? No. Sure, I could whip out a random fact at some party but that would instantly label me as the official party douche so even if I really, really wanted to, which I never will if I haven't been clear enough so far, I would stop myself from ruining the perfectly happy and probably drunken elated state of my friends with worthless ponderings.

For those who plan on becoming philosophy majors or are philosophy majors, hey, more power to you, but for me, I'd rather be taking something relevant to what actually matters to me rather than be required to take classes that either a. bore me to death, b. frustrate me, or c. make me wonder why someone would provide an answer to a question that never needed to be asked in the first place.

GAH!

JP

P.S. - Thanks for the questions, I'll be answering them in a post soon, I promise.

Ask Me Anything

2011-10-19T20:28:00.001-04:00

So I've realized I've never really done anything that truly let you guys, the readers, gain a little more insight as to who I am. Sure, I've done a few "About Me" posts and I can only imagine the conclusions you've drawn about me through reading my digital scribblings, but I want to know what you've possibly wondered about me.

Musical Non-sequitor alert! Nada Surf - Blonde on Blonde (Listen to it, it's a good song)

Well, that is going to change. I want you guys to ask me some questions. Anything and everything is up for grabs, including, but not limited to things about my personal life, what I like and don't like and my future plans.

I want to make this blog more fun so in the comments section leave your questions and I'll answer them in the near future.

Surprise me and tickle my mind with just how creative you can be.

Let's see what you've got,

JP

Note: I won't compromise the confidentiality of anyone mentioned in this blog including myself so other than that, you're good to go.

Scary Shit

2011-10-17T03:58:00.000-04:00

And hell week numbers two and three have begun. I have a German paper due, my German midterm, my Management and Organizational Behavior midterm, my Philosophy midterm and my second Managerial Accounting midterm in the next 10 days.

Plus, now with the last theater festival I was working on done, I have to dive head first into doing publicity for the next show- The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee. Auditions begin in two weeks and guess who will be designing the flyers and organizing shit all over again? This fella.

Fucking A, someone get me an IV and hook it up to an espresso maker, it's going to be a rough couple of days.

How do you deal with stress?

All the best,

JP

It's not you, it's me

2011-10-16T04:59:00.000-04:00

I've been in the emergency room twice in the past day, not for myself, but because of others. Today, to say the least, will be a memorable one, and not necessarily for the best reasons. I got up at 6:45 after a call from my aunt telling me my mom was hospitalized after having chest pains the night prior. It terrified me and I was with her until almost 4PM at that point. She's okay now and has been discharged from the hospital but things still left me rather shaken up.

Tonight was the "End of Show" party for the theater production I've been doing publicity for. Things were fun for the most part; it was crowded, hot and full of unwarranted affection (both friendly and less appropriate) but tonight will probably go down in my memory, or at least in this written form, as the night I got my first true rejection in a long while. Dorky-cute theater freshman and I had to call campus emergency medical services on a girl after the party tonight. She had wayyy to much to drink, was stumbling everywhere and we had to essentially carry her back to her dorm. By the time we got there, I made to decision to call the med service on her to get them to check her out. In the end, they took her to the ER where she is passed out tonight. While me and dorky cute freshman were waiting for her in the waiting room, we got to talking. Things quickly turned to our love lives and what we've done, if we'd had met people on campus and more in general.

During our talks, I had the slightest feeling of hope, the slightest feeling that maybe, just maybe, me and him had a connection. Maybe it was the many looks we exchanged or just how comfortable the conversation was between us; it was amazing. Then I learned two facts, that creeper guy from my previous posts that won't leave me alone was trying to get with him, and that he had the hots for the roommate of a guy who has been hitting on me but just really isn't my type. He talked about how they were both really shy around each other and how he thinks the roommate likes him back and it was cute and uncomfortable at the same time. We also talked about creeper and I kept telling him I felt that something was off about him (which I do feel honestly). We kinda volleyed back and forth conversation for about half a hour until finally, one of the med service people came up to us.

We were told that we could go back to our rooms and that our friend would be okay, we got to talking on the way back. I told him he should try out for the next play we were putting on while he tried to figure out what song he would use. The topic of creeper came back up and eventually he said that I really should tell him what I'd been withholding from him whether or now it had to do with creeper. At this point, the dialog went almost movie like.

As we approached his dorm, I finally eeped out what I had been holding in the whole time.

"I really don't want things to be awkward"

"Why, what do you mean?"

"Dorky cute freshman, you're really cute and sweet, and I kinda like you"

"I'm really flattered JP, but I just don't feel the same way in that sense about our friendship"

"I know" I said, bummed

We hugged at this point and we parted ways to go back to our respective dorms.

Needless to say, it hurt. I had been hoping, after this long night of helping a drunken freshman girl back to her dorm, calling in an ambulance and medical services to her and waiting in an ER for almost an hour would produce some good, but in the end it didn't work out quite that way. Needless to say, words cannot convey the level of emotion that was present when we exchanged those brief sentences but it was really nerveracking for me. I hoped something amazing would come out of this, but alas, the world just had different plans.

That's actually a lie though, if I didn't turn back and decide to help dorky-cute freshman bring the drunken friend back to her dorm (and by that I mean carry), she very well could have ended up being in very, very bad shape. You know what, maybe that's just how things were meant to turn out. Maybe me and dorky-cute freshman were just not meant to be. What matters in the end us that in spite of all my petty personal problems, someone I cared about was safe and sound in the end. Maybe I'll get karma point for this, who knows.

Man, I never realized how much rejection actually hurts. I get the distinct impression that right now, at this very moment at 4:48 AM, I still am not realizing or feeling the full extent of this pain, that tomorrow morning, I will understand things more. I'm tired, still kinda of drunk and honestly disillusioned from everything that transpired today. I really should have gone to bed a hour ago but I really wanted to get this down before I fell asleep.

Dorky-cute freshman was a really nice guy, sure, I will probably end up seeing him around campus in the future but I guess he'll always be special in a strange way. He wasn't my first rejection, but something about what happened tonight will make this memorable. I definitely want to stay friends with him, he's a wonderful guy and I truly hope we will stay in touch even after the show ends. I just wonder now how long it will take for me to get over him.

All the best,

JP

Memories

2011-10-10T17:29:00.000-04:00

Sometimes I wonder how things would be different if I had the courage to say what I wanted to say way back when. Thing like,
"I really like you, Southern, I really like you"

"You really shouldn't be with him, you're better than that and deserve someone who appreciates that"

"Stop trying to be someone you're not, that mask you're wearing isn't making you feel any better, and it's hurting you"

"Matt, Je t'aime"

"Your support made me into the man I am today, thank you"

"You really will change the world, whether you know it or not, you're destined to do great things and touch more lives than you will ever be able to count"

"No."

I guess I will never be able to find out what could have been. Going through life is like working your way back up a family tree, every five seconds reaching another fork, having to decide which way to go, each path taking you into radically different worlds. The power of words has never been fully appreciated I think. It still shocks me how a simple word of encouragement or denial can change how one sees the world. Maybe one day I will get that second chance to say what I wanted to all those years ago and see what could have been and maybe still can be.

Be bold, be proud, and live in the here and now; you never know what the future has in store for you. Live each day as if it were your last.

All the best,

JP

Rant

2011-10-01T19:40:00.002-04:00

Sorry, it's time to rant. It's been far too long since I've had some way to express the hidden frustrations I've been harbouring so here we go.

-begin rant-

You're a douche, I thought you should know that. I don't give a fuck that your father is some high up in a major corporation or that you fly around the world every few weeks. I don't care about your thoughts or views on a subject you obviously don't have any expertise in let alone any relevant link to. I don't care that you've met J Lo, P Diddy, Tiger Woods or whoever else. Your blatant disrespect towards others and need to go against the grain just for the sake of going against the grain is not appreciated just like your need to slam doors whenever you leave a room. You honestly don't deserve so many of the things that have been given to you. You don't deserve the amount of tolerance we've been giving to you and your your mannerisms; if it were me, you would have been kicked out of the group last fall.

One day you will get everything that the world has waiting for you in one sweep. I hope it knocks you off your perch and leaves you dazed and confused because you've had it coming to you for far too long, and let's face it, karma is a bitch.

-end rant-

Sorry I haven't been writing much lately. Midterms are here and I've been just filled to the brim with work. Once Columbus day weekend rolls around I'll be better and I'll start trying to write more regularly.

All the best,

JP

Leave Me Alone!

2011-09-26T00:22:00.000-04:00

The guy I hooked up with last night won't stop texting me and it's really starting to annoy me. I don't need a constant stream of texts asking what I'm up to, what my plans are for the night and descriptions of how you're obviously horny. I have work, I have a life, and I have responsibilities. Worse yet, this has been going on since I gave him my number a week ago. He's seriously acting like a lost puppy right now just following me via my phone wanting to know every detail of my life. I don't want to tell him to back off but I feel I'll probably have to soon if this keeps up.

I get it if you want to hook up again, but it's no fun if you're doing it every day. Yes, I'm looking for a relationship, but you, sir, are not the kind of guy I'm interested in. Also, as long as I'm looking and have people in my sights (aka adorkable freshman from theatre and this other freshman from the grilling club I'm in), I'd rather have spontaneous hot hookups rather than banal regular ones. I mean, I don't know about you but meeting a really hot guy and then find out you're hitting it off with him is pretty sick, whatever happens afterwards is just icing on the cake.

Yes, it does feel nice to be wanted, but sometimes that goes overboard like this situation is currently spiraling towards.

Damn, I can't believe I'm saying this but I don't want a fuck buddy. I won't be a slave to my dick, at least most of the time....

All the best,

JP

My Saturday

2011-09-25T02:08:00.000-04:00

-Up at 10-Breakfast, the dining hall actually had halfway decent food!?
-Did some microeconomics homework
-Bought a corkscrew on Amazon
-Went to the gym for an hour, set a new record 15 minute piece pace for myself - 2:02.1/500m.
-Production Staff meeting for the theatre production I'm doing publicity for, boring as ever
-Ordered dinner in with my friend Jacki, we watch The Princess and the Frog on Netflix while we eat
-Work until 11PM, I finish German and start laying the groundwork for my Philosophy paper
-Watch SNL with friends at another dorm
-Guy whose been trying to meet up me texts me, my roommate is out
-We mess around for a while and then he leaves
-I realize I have two massive hickies
-I text all my close female friends to find concealer, I have so many meetings tomorrow
-My friend Jacki teases me nonstop about this and then tells me she doesn't have any concealer
-My friend Eun texts back saying she does have some
-Get grilled about who it was, I refuse to answer
-Work on Philosophy paper some more
-Now I'm in bed.

Yeah, essentially this past week has been my hell week but now I'm finally free (sorta) but this upcoming week also looks to be pretty bad. Welcome back to school eh?

Oh, and belated hooray for the end of DADT!

All the best,

JP

Video: Coming Out in the Military

2011-09-20T15:58:00.000-04:00

This is probably the sweetest thing I've seen in weeks. This soldier is calling home to come out to his dad.

This guy just earned champ status in my books.

Cradle Robber

2011-09-19T02:26:00.002-04:00

I was voted most likley to be a cradle robber this year by a group of my friends. Funny thing is, I do have my eyes on a freshman who's in the theater production I'm doing publicity for. He's cute, kinda dorky and fun to talk to. We'll see where this goes.....

Sad thing is, German and Managerial Accounting have been eating up so much of my time I don't even know if I'll have enough of a social life in the near future to even make something happen. Ugh. Anyways, doesn't the fact that I'm younger than MANY of the freshmen make the whole cradle-robber label null and void?

Lol #2

2011-09-15T23:08:00.001-04:00

From my friend Maria's Tumblr

Gentlemen, I expect the same.

Fighting Myself

2011-09-14T02:08:00.001-04:00

Was there not enough pain and frustration the first time round that I seem to unconsciously feel the need to seek the one feeling I dread the most? It's been over a year now. Over a year since I began my college life where people, many of whom are now my friends, first entered my life and exposed me to a world with levels of acheivement and brilliance that I never once thought were possible apart from in a work of fiction....

It's the ludicrous levels of imagination, such profound creativity and deep, analytical thought that the trivial squeaks about the topic of the day pouring out of my mouth seem more like baby babble rather than coherent thoughts. There are people, friends with skills and knowledge that far surpass mine and go to the point where they understate their abilities on resumes and job applications to make them seem more human. I like to tell myself that comparing my abilities and views to them and theirs is wasteful. Time better spent would be on Microeconomics, Managerial Accounting or whatever other "useful" class that will one day earn me more money (because we all know that's what people in business care about...) I should just sit at my desk and read. Why waste time comparing myself to someone who is simply better?

When I started my freshman year, I knew that I would be entering a different world, one where "top of the heap" now meant "middle of the road". I felt lost in a pool of hundreds, all who fought for their spot to attend this school and got in with merits equal or probably better than mine. After my crisis last year about this very same problem I'm facing now, I felt that I finally made amends with myself. I accepted that we all have our own skills that make us better at something compared to our peers. It sounded childish then, like something my kindergarden teacher would tell me when Ben over there would colour within the lines better than I could, and it still sounds lubby dubby now.

It's only mid September, I just turned 19 and I still have so much ahead of me. Do I have to do what I did last year and just keep telling myself "It's Okay" when I know that deep down I will always have some nagging feeling whenever that someone passes by me on the way to class, reminding me "you're only average"? I don't want to be average. I will not settle for average. I don't want a Hershey's Bar when a Godiva truffle is right next to it. I don't want a Camry or Accord when I can have an E-Class or S80. I want to find that fighting spirit I once had when I knew I was close to the top just a handful of years ago. I don't think I lost it; I just tucked it away, something I regret doing. That fighting spirit got me here in the first place, if I can get it back, maybe I can do it again.

Sophomore Year: It's on.

Birthday

2011-09-10T02:28:00.000-04:00

19 never felt so good

Awkward....

2011-09-07T22:27:00.001-04:00

So I found out one of the guys I've been talking to on Grindr is actually one of my friends. I know without a doubt it's him and he knows the guy he's been talking with is me. I'm not terribly surprised this guy was into guys in retrospect but he's really closeted and I think he might be really freaked out right now that I found out in the way I did.

We haven't spoken since this incident occured a few hours ago.

This is awkward....

Week 1

2011-09-05T15:51:00.000-04:00

Sup Guys! I realize it's been a while since I last wrote but I've been a bit too busy to keep up with writing here but I finally found some. Let's catch up:

First week of classes: I met all my professors and I'm optimistic about this semester. Most of my professors seem pretty chill. I know they were probably trying to be all personable and funny but there's a surprising amount of young blood (comparatively speaking) in the staff. My Managerial Accounting professor is a really chill guy; it's his first year teaching and he cracked his fair share of jokes. The only thing which was kinda funny to me was that his suit was a size or two too big and looked kind of odd on him haha. My microeconomics class is my first true lecture style class. Before this year, the biggest class I was in had about 80 people (ethics this past Spring) and this time it's about 300. German is interesting to say the least; one of my classmates, a freshman, went to a school really close to mine in VA which was a nice surprise. Otherwise, it's staring from scratch for me, almost nothing transfers from my French classes in high school so finding out what all the umlauts and what "ß" sound like. It's pretty cool though; the professor is this young guy who's really in touch with us.

Welcome Week: This first week has been pretty much one giant last bash before classes take over our lives. The Student Activities fair was held yesterday on the front lawn and I joined the Grilling Society and the International Relations Club. I still think I'm going to continue with tutoring and also with the campus Pride organization as well. I don't know if I'm going to pursue a job this time around. The Grilling Society sets up a stand every Friday and sells burgers on one of the Plazas. I don't have classes Friday (apart from an Econ recitation for 45 minutes) so I'm going to dedicate myself to getting in to the crowd. It's really a get yourself known and help out until they like you and then they might promote you to "grillmaster". I already talked to a bunch of the members and the President of the club so I'm on my way I hope.

Fun: I've been going out almost non stop this past weekend but I think that's the point for the first week back. Friday I went to see Don't be Afraid of the Dark with a few of the guys; it wasn't particularly scary but was creepy enough and it made me jump a few times. I love Guillermo del Toro's work though and there were so many Pan's Labyrinth similarities too (favorite movie ever, stream it if you can) Saturday was the midnight fair on the front lawn, I rode a mechanical bull for the first time (fail) and bumped myself up on a few obstacle courses (double fail) but it was really fun in a stumbling-around-drunk and having stuff to climb on way. Last night was the IRC kickoff and welcome party as well. There were a ton of freshmen still on their "I'm in college" high but after a while it cleared out to being mostly upperclassmen. We were at an apartment for a while before eventually ending up at a townhouse around 1:30. Overall, good night.

Today is mostly a catch-up on work day. I worked on German homework for almost two hours and I still need to get some reading done for other classes but I'll probably do most of it tonight. I only have one class tomorrow anyways so I have more time if I need it. I'm also trying to stick with my summer workout program so I'm aiming to keep with going to the gym four or five days a week. I want to put on about three more pounds before I level off and just maintain. The only sad thing now is that looking on the workout memories of the ergs I'm so fucking slow compared to the varsity crew guys it's kinda depressing.

Still better than this guy though....

Alright, that's a decent enough recap of what's been going on. I'll try to start writing more often/regularly and talk about more interesting topics again. Also, there's a new blog I'm following here that I think you guys will find interesting so check him out. He's a freshman tennis player which is pretty cool since I'm thinking of picking up tennis in addition to boxing with my friend Alex soon. Go check him out.

All the best,

JP

Grindr

2011-08-29T00:56:00.000-04:00

Have you ever gotten that uncomfortable sinking feeling when you realize that you've stumbled upon something you probably shouldn't have? Well, that seems to be happening quite a lot recently. On my ipod touch I have an app called Grindr, now if you don't know what Grindr is (and based on the readers and audience of this blog I expect that most have at least heard of it) it's a app for gay guys to find each other using the GPS function on an iphone or ipod touch with wifi. The tame use is for finding friends while the more scandalous use of Grindr is that it's used for hookups and sex. A few months ago I downloaded Grindr and put up a profile; I got a lot of responses from creepy old guys and eventually just deleted it. A few days ago after I got back on campus, I decided to reinstall the app and see what would pop up, well, I found some interesting things.

First would be one of the RAs from my freshman year dorm. Now, he was openly gay and had a strange relationship with a thirtysome year old guy (repeat: STRANGE). But just seeing him on there is funny enough. Someone else I found is one of Liz's friends who I've asked before whether he was gay or not. He's not my type or anything but it was a curiosity I had, he was campy. Well, Liz told me that he wasn't and that he was a bit of a Casanova, well, this guy shows up as well. Even stranger is that he used his actual name which I thought broke Grindr rule no.1....

In addition to those I found a few other people who were only a few hundred feet away from me, one of whom messaged me this morning. Some I'm pretty sure are freshmen at the dorm next door while a few are probably in the upper classmen quad I'm part of. I don't have anything specific on my profile, I don't use a face pic (breaking Grindr rule no. 2...) and I try to just use it as a way to see what's going on around campus...okay, maybe I'll also use it for the occasional hookup but it's more of a "just for kicks" sort of thing for me...I promise.

JP

College Ver. 2.0....and go!

2011-08-27T16:22:00.000-04:00

One year ago, I was getting ready to move to college for the first time. It was a very tumultuous time with mixed emotions tempered by the sheer hectitude (not a word, but go along with it) of it all. One year ago, it was also very sunny, warm and honestly one of the most beautiful days I can remember. Fast forwrad to today and it's a different story...
Yes, there were still mixed feelings as I packed the car again and started to make my dorm my new home but the whole process was much smoother. I moved in early since I'm helping new students move in as a move-in aid but more on that later. We got back on campus at 9 this past Wednesday while everyone was pretty much still asleep. I got my key, found my dorm, and thankfully recognized a few names on the doors of my hall. My room is supposedly bigger than last year but it didn't quite feel like it; it's a lot more square which I think is why. Also, much to my dismay there is no sink in the room anymore. My mom and I spent a few hours cleaning and unpacking my things, clothes and getting everything ready to go. We ended up getting lunch afterwards and after a few more trips picking up things I had forgotten from home we said our goodbyes again. Thank god I live close to home.

With hurricane Irene slowly making its way up the coast I made sure ot take advantage of Thursday and Friday's nice weather as much as I could. yesterday me and my friend Kate rented a pair of bikes and rode riverside to the monuments, memorials and up and down the National Mall for about two hours and that night me, Liz and Audrey went down to get Chipotle and some ice cream down on Wisconsin before it got too dark out. We chatted about how different things were coming back for our sophomore years compared to how it was before. How we weren't scrambling to say "hi" to every person we see and weren't scared out of our minds that were weren't going to have friends. Looking back, freshman move-in was probably one of the strangest parts of my life so far.

Irene made its way into the area starting early this morning and by the time I woke up things were pretty grey and dreary out; no rain, but you could feel it in your bones. At 11 I began my shift for move-in aiding, it was for an upper classmen dorm off campus and home to mostly transfers. After a quick start things slowed down to nothing and I ended up just sitting there with four other aids and chatting about all sorts of things after an initial hour of awkward silence. It was probably one of the most boring experiences of my life, the only consolation was the other guy there, a junior, was kinda hot. He wasn't mind-blowingly good looking but he had great azur blue eyes; I'm a sucker for nice eyes.

The hurricane is only going to get worse later tonight so me and a few others are just ordering-in and having a psuedo-hurricane party. The freshmen are slowly arriving (great time to move in eh?) and the kickoff festivities are soon. Alright, I promise to start writing about more interesting stuff soon but I needed to do a quick update first.

JP

Earthquake

2011-08-23T16:07:00.000-04:00

Rhydon used "Earthquake" on the East Coast, it was super effective!

End of the Summer

2011-08-23T00:47:00.002-04:00

Summer is slowly coming to an end, and in a few days I'll be moving back to campus for my sophomore year. Usually at this time and when I do my end-of-summer post I make some comment as to how short and quick it felt; well, this year doesn't quite fit that mold. Surely, it does feel like the past three months were faster than any three months spent at school, but this was definitely a long summer. Given it was about half a month longer than any high school summer it makes sense but even it was shorter it was definitely one of the quietest and smoothest summers I remember.

Today:
Today was my last day at work and let's just say it ended with a bang...not necessarily in a good way, but with some theatrics nonetheless. This morning my tire pressure sensor light came on, and when I got the garage, my front left tire was pretty much flat, great start to the day. Later, after I opened the store, I find out there was some massive accounting/record keeping fail over the weekend and I had to dig up and fax three days worth of receipts and paperwork to home office...I've never sent a fax in my entire life. Later, one of my coworkers forgot he was supposed to come in so I had to do an emergency call to my mom to bring me lunch since I couldn't leave the store. That kid, we'll call him K, is so freaking unreliable and irresponsible sometimes, it's the second day in a week he "forgot" he was scheduled to work *headshake*. Well, I left work early and went to changing the tire, another first for me. It was probably one of the most unpleasant things I've ever had to do, but it was better to do it in the garage rather than on the side of the highway. Me and my mom drove to the tire shop and we left the punctured tire for them to take a look at and see if it can be patched or if it needs to be replaced.

Fast forwarding, I just got back from a late dinner with Dutch and Mads. We got Korean BBQ in Annandale (Koreatown pretty much) and caught up. They were all excited about the "exotic" experience and we talked about plans for the upcoming year. Something that came up again was the surprise that Southern Charm and one of the captains from the crew team were roommates this year. It's surprising because SC is probably one of the most chill people ever and Captain is probably one of the most intense people I know, strange mix. Mads immediately jumped on how she found it suspicious and implied that maybe they had ulterior motives for rooming beyond just being friends from the same high school. Y'all know how I feel about SC, the goofy grinning, adorable, blue-eyed friend who I had a thing for back during my senior year and how I suspected he was gay, a sentiment that now I know both Dutch and Mads share. Captain is more confusing; I'm pretty sure he's straight but I guess you can never be sure. Mads suggested that it may be one-way with SC and Captain which I could see since Captain isn't half bad looking. Ugh, I need to get over that boy; he was just a good friend though it will probably continue to bother be anyways.

After dinner, we drove home with conversation about music and our mutual love for Adele...

Adele - Set Fire to the Rain

Well, a little while after we set off, a freaking deer jumps in front of the car. Mads slammed on the brakes while we all screamed our lungs dry and continued to panic for a few minutes after. It was terrible/exciting/funny/terrifying all at the same time. If this isn't the the "rogue deer running into the road" I've had as part of my blog description for over two years I don't know what is.

Summer in Review:

Work
I completed my first true job! It went pretty well I think; working retail, while getting a bum rap wasn't too bad. Granted, I worked in the kind of store where the clientele are nicer and um....more refined in taste than the average store which could have helped. I got valuable life experience and I think my people skills really improved from interacting with so many people for the past three months. One thing I did learn though is that people can be very egotistical, rude assholes sometimes, despite my prior statement. In addition to developing people skills, I think I've also become hardened against criticisms and person attacks on things I have no control over. My favorite line has become "I will never come back to this store unless you do ____". Advice: if you ever use this line, any retail worker with a modicum of experience is laughing his or her ass off on the inside. While I might try to apologize/explain things, on the inside, we are all thinking "Bitch, please, you're not special and we have countless other clients and it's only growing bigger with each day" on the inside. At least some of the music they play at work helps cheer things up...

Nicole Atkins - Maybe Tonight

I hope to return to my job back during my winter break. In the mean time I'm looking to find a job close to campus for maybe two shifts a week to make some spending money. I got a few applications ready and a few references so hopefully my search will turn out to be fruitful. Plus my resume has some actual work experience on it now!

Relaxing
Having a job for once over the summer ate up most of my otherwise lazy-time, and probably for the better. I did get plenty of relaxation though; the cruise with my mom was really nice and really recharged my batteries. I also enjoyed sleeping in and constantly getting about 8 hours of sleep every night; I'm going to miss it once classes start....

Working Out/Weight Gain
At the beginning of the summer I set the goal ot put on some weight and getting more fit. I've been hitting the gym regularly about 4 days a week, sometimes more if I have the time. I have made progress, I've put on about 8 or so pounds since the end of May, mostly on my upper body - arms, back and chest to an extent. My abs have much more definition than before which I really like and I think with a few more weeks and two more pounds I should be at my goal.

The Coming Year
My sophomore year looks to be pretty interesting. I'm taking another new language, this time the language will be German. I'm taking intro to German this fall semester, and if I like it I'll keep on it; it's non-intensive which is what I'm looking for since I'm not looking for something that will be too time consuming. I'm working on remembering/using French and my two dialects of Chinese as much as I can so my years of work won't be for naught. I'm also in Accounting II, MicroEcon, Management Organizational Behavior, and a philosophy class. I'm looking forward to a good year so cheers to that. As I said, I'm planning to find a job and continue with the clubs I'm already in including tutoring, Pride and helping out Liz with promoting a student-written collection of one-act plays for parent's weekend. I even got myself a new Laptop for the new year - it's another HP but with a Gen 2 Core i5 processor, 6GB of RAM and a 640GB hard drive. It's only 14" but I'm bring both the new one and my old 16" laptop to campus as a backup/stay-in-room computer since I still haven't transferred all my files.

Adele - Turning Tables

Well, I'll be moving back to campus Wednesday and getting settled in slowly. Classes don't start for another week or so but I'm helping the new freshmen move in and so I get to get back early and avoid the crowds. Plus, it gives me an opportunity to deck out my room and make it homey. I'll post pictures when it's done. The weather is finally getting nice; after weeks of 95+ degree weather or storms, it's been in the low-mid 80s and partly cloudy (win!). I'm picking up my keys tomorrow and look forward to enjoying my last day at home, at least until I stop by to visit. I'm planning on enjoying home cooking one last time, dining hall food only gets you so far unfortunately...

Alright guys, I hope things are going well in your neck of the woods. I have some catching up to do regarding reading blogs. I'm going to try commenting more in the future (I know how I love comments and others as well) and keep y'all updated if anything exciting comes up.

All the best,

JP

Leo

2011-08-21T20:50:00.003-04:00

Watching Titanic on VH1 makes me yearn for the days when Leonardo DiCaprio was young and cute...

When I was little, (aka 5) I thought Titanic was the coolest thing in the entire world, I actually saw it about five times in theaters, I don't know how many times on VHS (remember those?) and my parents would play the sound track in the car whenever we went out for a drive; I was such a loser.

Just do me already!

Don't get me wrong, he's not bad looking now, but he's not one of those actors that seems to be getting hotter with age unfortunately :/

Oh well, I guess I'll just have to stick with Ryan Gosling...

drooling....

....still drooling

Forget Leo, do me now you classy-ass motherfucker!

Now excuse me while I try to collect myself from being all hot and bothered...

Flashmobs

2011-08-20T02:32:00.000-04:00

It's beginning to seriously bother me how some people can be so idiotic and devoid of any moral reasoning or concept of right and wrong. This rant is mostly based the recent craze of "flashmobs" and "flash robberies" that seeming is spreading across the US but is hitting especially hard in the DC area.

It's starting to get annoying that all I heard on the local news is about these flash mobs and groups of teenagers robbing stores at 3AM but flooding them in groups and then running off with mountains of stuff. Seriously? Are some people so immoral or just plain stupid that they feel the need to join some mob-mentality spurred grab and dash to rob some unsuspecting store owner? People have even gotten hurt in the process of these flash mobs lately, about a week ago, two people got severely beaten when a flash mob suddenly popped up in the area. Psychologists say people are doing it for the thrill of it, but there are plenty of ways to get a thrill that doesn't involve breaking the law. I hope this craze will pass soon and the people who were involved just get arrested already so we can get on with our lives and real news like this can actually be reported (doubt it, people like sensationalist media too much X/ )

Flash mobs, at least during their inception as clever advertising tactics, can be a positive force for change. What garners more attention for a cause than the surprise mob of people working towards some positive change for their community? Little. I think it started with T-Mobile about two years ago who did this little number...

...but my favorite would probably be some done by a Belgian TV station to promote some acting competition relating to the Sound of Music. (Those crazy Europeans lol)

And can I please not how homogeneous (aka white) they are there? They should rename Antwerp "Wonderbreadlandia"

Well, anyways, school is going to start soon and I'll give y'all an update as to what has been going on in my life ASAP; I just wanted to get that off of my chest first.

Thanks for reading,

JP

2011-08-13T01:31:00.001-04:00

Le plus grand faible des hommes, c'est l'amour qu'ils ont de la vie.

-Molière

Interrogation Time

2011-08-12T02:59:00.001-04:00

So two DMs (district managers) came to the store today to interview all the employees about a recent string of incidents with money going missing from the registers and stocks going missing too. It was actually kind of intimidating the way they did things; they took us to the back room one by one and did a whole series of interrogation-style rapid fire questions. They were asking about which of my coworkers I would trust and if I witnessed anything suspicious or sketchy which I didn't really. Honestly, if you didn't have anything to hide there was nothing to worry about but I know two of my coworkers got a hard grilling by one of the DMs that had eyes that were bulging out of her head and were the size of dinner plates.

"So I just sit here? Okay, Hi, my name is J...OH SWEET JESUS"

Since we had so many people come in the store at once things were kind of awkward. To put in perspective, we open and close the store by ourselves and there are never more than two people working at once, but we had four people working all at once this afternoon and at once point, had six people in the store working at the same time. The place I work is tiny.

The DMs finally left around 5 or so but not before telling us we all had to wear the ugly company aprons. My regular manager couldn't care less about aprons; she hates them about as much as I do, which is vehemently. I'm only working for this week, next week and one one last day the week after before I go back to school so I'll probably just wear the stupid things since I only work a handful more times. We ended up just standing around and chatting about music until I left.

Maybe if I tell myself aprons are sexy they will be.....hah, fat chance. They make people look like bloated cows.

Oh, finally, I definitely recommend Google Imaging "Sexy Apron", I got a good laugh from the results.

My Gulty Pleasures

2011-08-09T00:14:00.003-04:00

Guilty Pleasure, n. engl.

1. something you shouldn't like, but like anyway
2. something that you love to do, but you just cannot admit you do it.

Via Urban Dictionary

Everybody has a few guilty pleasures, those things you do and loves you have but really don't want others knowing since they're silly, disgusting or whatever other reason. So here are some of my guilty pleasures from habits of mine to some of my favorite things I hate to love and love to hate.

My Guilty Pleasure Food: Cheesy Anything. Cheesy Potatoes, Cheesy Scrambled Eggs, Cheese Biscuits etc.

Why: Cheese, like bacon, makes everything taste better I think, well, anything savoury at least. Yeah, as far as dairy goes it isn't terribly good for you but it's damn tasty so I don't care :)

My Guilty Pleasure Dessert: Bread Pudding

Why: Why am I separating food and dessert? Well, because desserts and sweets are too special to lump together with regular food. Well, bread pudding is my guilty pleasure because it's warm, comforting and because, well, I make some mean bread pudding. I'll admit, I've eaten half a pan of the stuff before (and felt the consequences soon after) but it's soo delicious and I have it so rarely I'll always overdo it when I get some.

My Guilty Pleasure TV Show: Teen Wolf

Why: Everything I know and love about good shows tells me I should hate this show. It's like my Jersey Shore, even though I am proud to say I have never watched an episode of that crap. The plot is questionable in its quality at best and the premise of the show is tired and abused enough at this point but I can't stop watching. Maybe it's the fact I want to lick Derek (Tyler Hoechlin), date the adorkable Stiles (Dylan O'Brian) or cheat on Stiles with the dimpled gay token character Danny (Keahu Kahuanui)....kidding, I would never cheat on someone, but choosing between the two would be one hell of a difficult decision. Dammit, now I'm getting obsessed with the characters of the show who don't even fucking exist. This just goes to show any hormonal gay boy can have his usual regimen of Law and Order and CSI be swayed with copious amounts of shirtlessness and cheesy plots.

Sometimes the music they choose isn't half bad though,

Kids of 88 - Just A Little Bit (Playing now if you haven't paused the sidebar music)

My Guilty Pleasure Bad Habit: Unnecessarily Passing on the Highway

Why: ~~Because people suck at driving.~~ The real reason is probably because I have a newer car with more power than I technically need but hey, it's there, why not use it. My favorite thing is at night after work, I-495 becomes really quiet and people are going 80+ so I go a little faster. Bad habit, but I love speed ;).

My Guilty Pleasure Hidden Secret: I'm a Super Geek

Why: So I've been a nerd or geek all my life. From elementary school though most of middle school it defined me but things got tempered a bit in HS. Deep at my core though I'm a massive geek. I love machines, figuring out how things work, the science and chemical reactions behind everyday things, science fiction, and memorizing useless information like horsepower ratings for probably 100+ cars and counting. So, behind the now more clean, sharply dressed and collected exterior lives the chubby, awkward nerd that I'll always love and embrace.

My Guilty Pleasure Splurge: Express Dress Shirts

Why: I've recently really taken to liking button downs and dress shirts, especially the 1MX shirt from Express. I'm a stickler for cut and fit so the fact that those shirts cut as close as they do works for me. They're expensive though, even if they are BOGO 50% off at $60 a piece but I love them and will probably get more soon.

My Guilty Pleasure Music: Music from Glee

Why: I usually hate covers but I won't lie, I've downloaded quite a few songs from the Glee albums. I didn't mention this earlier, but second to Teen Wolf, Glee is probably my second guilty pleasure TV show.

Glee Cast- Marry You

So there are a few of my guilty pleasures; I have plenty more but this post is long enough as is. Maybe I'll do a part 2 later on. I need to open at work tomorrow so I'm off to bed.

What are some of your guilty pleasures?

All the best,

JP

The Past Week

2011-08-07T15:02:00.000-04:00

So I haven't fallen off the face of the earth but I have been busy for the past week and just got home, so, recap of the past week.

Saturday, July 30, Florida

-Up at 3:30 to catch a 6:00AM flight to Atlanta from Dulles
-Taxi arrives, the AC was on high the entire 40 minute ride, I was freezing and so was my mom
-The airport is surprisingly busy but check-in goes smoothly enough
-Security takes forever because idiots think bringing full sized bottled of shampoo as a carry-on is o-k
-Flight to Atlanta goes smoothly, I don't know why people hate Delta so much, they're nice people
-I hate Atlanta's airport, it's noisy, overcrowded and poorly laid out, it's only a 1.5 hour layover thankfully
-Arrive at Orlando and try to find transportation
-Immediately get approached by a guy who is trying to drive us to the ship terminal for $25 a person, he's sketchy and we don't like him but my mom is too timid to say no, it's ridiculous, uncomfortable and not worth it.
-Check-in at the port goes smoothly, the travel agency didn't recognize my mom's prior-cruiser record so she didn't get a gold card
-We get on board and wait in line for 45 minutes before getting the issue sorted at the info desk. the Ship is pretty new so it looks quite nice inside.

-The room is nice, we booked an interior room on the 11th deck, it's a handicap room so the bathroom is freaking massive, total win.
-I explore a bit, the gym is decent but only one floor unlike the last ship which was two, there is an erg though.
-Dinner was cool, me and my mom got a private two-seat table by the window, our waiter is not the chattiest but nice and prompt. The Maitre'd was also funny.
-Our dining room table neighbors are really sweet, next to us are a first time cruise family with two daughters. The younger one (probably 7 or 8) is super picky about food based on color, she hates "white gravy" and light coloured sauces lol. The table behind us had a really WASP-y family and a really attractive Thai family. The WASP family had three kids, the son, maybe a year or two younger than me was pretty good looking and the Thai family had three boys around my age who were really hot....seriously.
-That night I head straight to the Casino, play about $40 on blackjack, went as high as up by $30 and down to $5 but settle with a loss of $20
-Go to bed around 1-ish

Sunday - Nassau

-Up around 9:30, get breakfast and go back to the room
-Watch a movie until around 1 and then head out
-It's really hot and it's all just shops, I was here in Spring too so not much to really do
-Stop back at the same bar I was at last time, they're still playing really loud Nicki Minaj and Weezy
-Back on the ship at 4
-Dinner's not until late so I go to the gym, the erg is buttery smooth, if only the gym at home had one this nice
-Shower and then get ready for dinner
-It's the first formal night so I dress up
-Dinner was decent, the Caesar Salad is really tasty and the fish I had was good enough, it needs more seasoning though
-The wait staff performs for us in a dance routine to "Low" by Flo Rida, awkward but funny nevertheless.
-On the way out, the kids at the teen club are all out in the halls and kinda loud and annoying
-My mom goes to see the show and I go back to the blackjack table
-The people I play with are hilarious, one guy I saw at dinner and the night before is playing at the same table as I am, he's from Alabama and goes to Ole'Miss, his accent is kinda sexy and he's pretty hot too. The other table people are three friends all in their early 40s. The two ladies are drunk and the guy is just laughing. One lady is a total cougar and is hitting on Ole'Miss. They buy a bucket of beer and share with the table. win.
-I end up winning about $40 so I'm even again for the trip
-Bed around 12:30

Monday - Sea Day

-Wake up around 9:30
-After breakfast, they make an announcement saying that because of Trop Storm Emily, we would have ot re-route and change two of our stops, kind of a bummer
-I catch a chair on deck and work on reading 1984
-Lunch is a weird mix of Italian and Asian food, I end up eating a lot of fruit and pasta
-I explore the ship some more and find a piano bar and look at some of the shops, liquor is so damn cheap!
-Dinner is meh, I was sleepy for some reason even after my regular double espresso with dessert
-I go back to the room and watch Law and Order, I fall asleep and don't wake up until 2:00, I don't even bother and just go back to bed.

Tuesday - Grand Turk, Turks and Caicos

-Arrive at our first re-route spot, Grand Turk, Turks and Caicos
-It's a really small port, just some jewelry shops, Margaritaville and a beautiful beach
-I shop with my mom for a bit and then go exploring
-Magaritaville is one massive frat pool party, drunk college students and 20-somethings everywhere dancing to extremely loud music, not really my kind of scene
-I settle on just finding a chair under a palm and just enjoying the weather and people watch

-Back on the ship around 4
-Shower and then find a deck chair to read some more
-Dinner was highlighted by one of the waiters singing an Elvis song for us, he's pretty good
-I go with mom to see a Canadian Female Impressionist singer who did Tina Turner, Cher, Macy Gray and a few others. He opening Cher act kinda sucked but the rest of her songs were actually pretty good
-Blackjack was a win, I went up $70
-Went to bed watching Jimmy Fallon

Wednesday - Sea Day

-Wake up late around 10:30
-Breakfast, gym and sunbathe for a little while
-Return Cruiser's party in the main theatre, free drinks ftw
-Couple sitting next to us down Screwdrivers like it's nobodys business
-I have a beer, a rum punch and a whiskey sour, the last might be one of my new favorite drinks
-I go read for a little while and I realize around then that I was tiiipsy; George Orwell was never more entertaining
-I try the Mongolian Barbecue/Wok station for lunch, the lady behind me kept asking for things that weren't out even though it was buffet style.
-Mom comments that I drink so quickly, lolz
-Dinner was quiet, the family with two kids next to us provide entertainment since the little one goes through three entrees before she finally eats something. We promise Jay, the bar guy, that we will order something tomorrow.
-Lose the previous day's winnings at blackjack, but the dealer and I become buddies. A Floridian couple with six kids (damn) talk about how I don't have any accent and that I'm a proud Amurican and then go on bashing the Indian political and health care systems
-Me and the dealer school them on how they are wrong on so many accounts and how India is the world's largest democracy and money exists in spades despite what people think. higher education + native background ftw
-Bed to "Letters to Juliet", click flick overload

Thursday - Freeport

-Up around 9:30
-Me and my mom go to Port Lucaya to shop around a little, pretty much the exact same as when we were here in Spring. It's really hot and boring
-We go back to the ship early and grab a pizza to share
-The gym is really crowded so I had ot wait to use many machines
-Second formal night and the bar guy Jay holds us to our word, mom gets white zin and he brings me a Mojito. I don't know why but it just sounds like a gay drink to me. It's not too bad though
-Dinner was good, I had prime rib which was really tasty and tender
-Jay never brings us our receipt but thinks we live on a farm since we're from Virginia. He's from South Africa which is pretty cool
-Deck party that night, live performers who did a variety of songs, around 11 they did a rock show and handed out glowsticks

-Grab some late night snacks
-Bed around 1

Friday - Sea Day

-Up around 10
-There's a farewell party around 5 so I grab a chair on deck and read/listen to music
-Gym around 2, I finally meet the other person who actually does erg workouts, she's one of the event coordinators on board and she has some really toned arms, she probably was a rower in the past
-The hot Thai guys are also on deck too as is the hot WASP family son. It was an ab fest, not much reading got done haha
-Farewell party at 5, Jay was serving there too and was trying to get me and my mom drunk towards the end of the party he just dumped the last four drinks on our table. The Thai family parents were sitting next to us and were giving us strange looks, we explained our way out of awkwardness/prove we weren't alcoholics
-Last dinner was calm, I had some surprisingly good Indian vegetarian. the head chef was Indian so that probably played a role. They staff sang a farewell song just like they did in my spring cruise. Jay kept asking for what he could bring us, I have a margarita on the rocks and mom has some fruity drink
-Dessert was soufflé which was good but kinda sucks it was on the last night. Princess Cruise Lines had it every night
-Jay tells us to go to the last comedy show at 11 and midnight, he'll hook me up
-I go to the 11pm show, Jay was there and gets me a Blue Chevy 57, some bright blue drink with lime vodka, also a glass of water "so mom doesn't get mad"
-The first guy was kinda blah, lots of penis jokes, lots of old recycled jokes I've heard before
-after the first show he comes back and asks what I want to get now, I tell him to surprise me, he brings me something like a long island but not if that makes sense. It tastes of rum, tequila and vodka and is strong as fuck. He also brings a shooter
-During the break, I find my mom, the blue drink is catching up on me but I find mom listening to s singer in the lobby
-The second performer was better and did more improv stuff, I found it to be funnier though I don't know if it was because he actually was funnier or if it was the long island like thing. Still lots of penis jokes
-About 30 minutes later everything was funny and I was becoming chatty. I hadn't had that much to drink since my Accounting final finished
-We leave the lounge and thanks Jay one last time, he's a great guy and gave us about $80 worth of drinks for free between the two of us during the trip so he's a winner in my book
-Bed around 12

Saturday - Florida

-Up around 6:30
-One last breakfast and then taxi to Orlando to catch our flight home
-Get a call from Maria, apparently shit has been going down at work and investigators from loss prevention are coming later this week to ~~interrogate~~ interview all the employees. Maria has $100 stolen from her purse and about $200 worth of product/money has gone missing from the store. The district manager is coming up from Florida as well. We have a hunch as to who is/are to blame
-Home to Reagan National around 4, my uncle picks us up
-It starts to torrential downpour on the way home but stops after about 15 minutes
-Finally home

So nothing too crazy went down but it was nice to just chill and relax. Today's mom's birthday so I need to plan out some surprises for later tonight.

Peace y'all

-JP

What If?

2011-07-30T00:00:00.000-04:00

If you could do one thing in your life over again differently, what would it be?

I heart debt

2011-07-26T21:07:00.002-04:00

Not really. Curiously, while all the news networks talk nonstop about the GOP and Dems both battling out some resolution to the debt crisis on Capital Hill, we really don't feel it at the everyday Joe the plumber level most of us live in. Yes, gas prices have gone up and food prices and such but those are market factors at work, when was the last time you actually said "Oh damn, the national debt prevented me from buying XYZ" Really, the US has held a debt for the better part of time since the 1940s if not earlier. Only recently did the debt really jump to the levels we're panicking about today.

Since neither side of the political spectrum seems to want to budge (I think they're suffering from a severe case of Kindergarten "I don't wanna"itis) it could be a possibility that the US might default on her loans. Why can't this happen? Well, for better or for worse, the US' position as the main superpower of the world politically and economically (at the time being, China is creeping up fast) means defaulting would show weakness, and in the massive global game of chess, the US's position of King of the West needs to be guarded. There is a reason why whenever some crisis occurs in Africa or Asia, it's the United States who is called upon to provide aid. We have the money, the resources and the man power to do so, it's the basis for how she can get other nations to do what she wants. If the US defaults, her hegemony is essentially halved or even more (less?). The message sent out to the world isn't one of power, omnipotence and omniscience regarding international affairs, but as the fallen giant who epitomizes the reason we had our last recession, spending money we didn't have. So, while today we might not directly feel the impact of the debt, in the next few years we probably will, and not in the "I can't buy this" sense, but in the "Who gives a shit about the country who can't pay its own debts?" sense the next time we try to do something big in the international arena.

Politicians needs to stop bickering and get off their sorry asses and get shit done. They've forgotten the reason they're in their elected position in the first place, to serve the nation and put the interests of the public in the forefront. Instead, they've gotten stuck trying to put down the opposing party and blowing hot air. My generation is already economically screwed over thanks to these goons who think raising the debt ceiling will change anything. Ignoring the problem or sweeping it under the rug won't do anything, in five years, we'll be right back where we started only to find the problem has grown even bigger.

So Republicans and Democrats: Stop acting like little children and get your shit together.

d'awwwwwww

2011-07-24T21:52:00.000-04:00

I have a list of topics I plan on covering in the coming week before I leave on holiday so stay tuned.

In the mean time, enjoy this baby sloth and quiver at the adorableness.

JP

Back on the Water

2011-07-19T23:21:00.001-04:00

So as you guys know, I really miss rowing and my days on the crew team, well, today I completed two crew related dreams in one - I tried sculling for the first time and I got back on the water for the first time in over a year.

For those of you who don't know what sculling is, it's basically the kind of rowing you probably think of when you think of rowing as a sport, the kind with two oars per rower. It's a little harder than the sweep rowing (one massive oar) I did in high school since you have to manipulate each oar individually. I met up with Dutch who took out a single while I went out with my friend Less in a double. I stupidly took bow seat knowing I would have to steer since I hate being stroke seat or the person that everyone behind has to follow. We got the shell in the water just fine and we got in and head out.

I was worried I would feel lost the entire time, but wobbliness aside, it was better than I expected. Less had been out quite a few times in a single so she knew the ropes much better than I did so I really appreciated her putting up with my ineptitude. I kept trying to remember "left over right" the entire time, meaning to keep my left hand over my right when doing the stroke and on the recovery afterwards. We were on the water for about an hour, trying out rowing on my own and eventually both of us giving it a go. I found that steering was a bitch and we spent more time going in zig zags than straight lines but it worked out in the end. Even though I was spending more time worrying about flipping the boat, I still got the "flying" sensation I missed so much, the water was absolutely still which only made things even more amazing for me. I really hope I get a chance to go out again later this summer; I want to practice sculling some more so maybe I can go out in a single on my own in the future.

Grade A day if I do say so myself.

And We Move On

2011-07-18T02:57:00.000-04:00

I had another talk with my mom today, part of a long string of talks we've had over the future of the family and how things are proceeding between her and my dad. Today she went to talk to the husband of a close family friend; he's an attorney and is advising her in what divorce proceedings entail and the possible risks involved. I didn't go personally but when she finally got back after about four hours and looking tired both physically and emotionally, I knew quite a lot had gone down.

It looks like things are actually happening this time. She realizes it's going to be a long and drawn out fight; my dad, like me, is very stubborn and will never let himself lose, but unlike me, he doesn't know when to stop and accept a deal. The family friend is working to find my mom a good lawyer right now and time will only tell where things proceed from there. What made today different however is that she said that she was finally over "it", "it" being trying to fix the marriage that is well beyond repairability.

In approximately two weeks from today, my parents were supposed to go on their 19 day Northern Europe cruise/holiday but obviously that was cancelled. With my mom already taking those days off and me not having set my August work schedule yet, we decided that we would take our own holiday together. This evening we booked what is going to be our own summer holiday. It's a seven day cruise to the Eastern Caribbean leaving from Florida which will double as a celebration for my mom's birthday which falls right after we get back. Interestingly, the original cruise scheduled was supposed to encompass both my mom's birthday and what was supposed to be my parent's anniversary. My mom still has a few days before and after the cruise days which she is trying to figure out right now.

Both of us need this escape, her to get away from it all and me to get away from D.C. for a little while. After a while, traffic, suburbia and familiarity gets pretty monotonous, even with the company of good friends. I plan to get my fair share of fun while I'm out, beaches, fine dining, drinking and the like. The ship we're sailing on is very new too so that should be pretty cool to explore. Strange thing about cruise holidays, they never seem to get old; I think this will be number eleven for me. The goal for this holiday will be to relax, simple enough. Be both can use this.

Pass the Chips

2011-07-17T11:58:00.004-04:00

Saturday

-wake up and grab a quick breakfast before I go with my mom so she can get some x-rays done
-grab lunch at a local pho place, don't get pho in the end
-go to the gym for a little while, do a steady state erg piece and lift a little
-run home and change to meet with Ms. X and a few other friends
-friend is house sitting for relatives and has a pool we can use. I'm greeted by an overly excited and loud schnauzer
-I'm a little late but end up being the first to arrive
-when Ms. X arrives we go chill by the pool and try to figure out dinner plans, we fail
-decide to walk over to the grocery store and wing it
-decide on macaroni salad, a bag of chips, a whole watermelon and chicken nuggets from the freezer back at my friend's house
-I got to carry the 18 lb. watermelon back to the house, pain...
-we get everything prepped and eat on the deck. It was really nice out and the neighbors were also having a barbecue
-On the way to go to the theatre, we conclude that both the neighbors are Chinese. It turns out they both own exclusively Toyotas and Hondas, suspicions confirmed
-arrive at the theatre just before the movie starts, we get seats closeish to the screen meaning we had to bend out necks since the seats don't recline
-the movie was really good and it was also not as long and drawn out as I expected. I <3 IMAX
-my neck was sore for a little while after and Ms. X had motion sickness on the drive back and crashed in bed when we got back to the house
-Me and the other two take the dog, Baxter, out for a walk
-get back and I chop up another quarter of the watermelon; we finish that and the rest of the bag of chips while watching American Pickers, Pawn Stars and Modern Marvels
-midnight - I drive one of my friends home and then embark home myself
-I think I missed a turn or something and wind up in the middle of an office park in South Bumblefuck, Whoknowswhere
-I finally relent and break out the GPS
-It turns out I had to backtrack about 3 miles to get to a road I was traveling on...in the wrong direction >.>
-finally find my way back to the highway and eventually home
-make some eggs and toast for a snack and eventually went to bed...fully dressed

Harry Potter and the Apathetic Teenager

2011-07-14T00:45:00.001-04:00

Am I being blasphemous if I say that I am apathetic about the release of the final Harry Potter movie? People have been saying that it's the end of an era, that this is symbolic of the end of our childhoods in cinematic form, but I don't see it that way. Sure, the Harry Potter movies are pretty good, and they have definitely come a long way since HP and the Sorcerer's Stone came out so many years ago, seeing the debut of little Daniel Radcliffe, Rupert Grint and Emma Watson as well as the now surprisingly good looking Matthew Lewis (aka Neville Longbottom).

lolz, whut?

Nevertheless, I did grow up with the magical world of the boy wizard. Yes, I read the books (albeit with gratuitous amounts of page skipping and skimming at times), saw all the movies, and even had a dementor costume during my year as a sevie in middle school (lame, I know), but however exciting it was, I never became the fanboy that so many became. Sure, it was cool and in the future Harry Potter will probably be remembered as the apex of literary achievement for my generation but it never caught my attention as much as say my favorite work of all time 1984 by Orwell did. It's not like I don't have a thing for references to mythical creatures, fantasy works, or Rowling's deft use of imagery and syntax to paint brilliant images and scenes of a world I sometimes wish were real, Harry Potter just never "clicked" with me.

When I say "clicked" I mean that feeling you get when you know that something will be integral in shaping who you are and something you will remember for the very rest of your life. While the second part of that statement is probably true, the first one isn't. I got my first Harry Potter book as a gift from a family friend as a Christmas gift. I remember very clearly that it was the biggest book I'd ever received up to that point, it was intimidating and judging by the odd cover of a boy with a scar on his forehead riding a broom, I wasn't too enthralled or eager to sit down and just read; granted, very few books have been able to do that. Eventually I did start reading it, and it was interesting and fun in its on way but I don't remember ever staying up late or wanting to read one more chapter more than I intended to.

As I worked through the other books, things didn't really change; it really wasn't until the final book, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows did the thrill of reading the series hit me. Maybe it's because my tastes have matured or evolved. Instead of the books, I indulged myself in the movies which served me well enough in enjoying the story. Harry Potter turned out to be one of the few movie franchises where the films were as good as the books if not occasionally better; the same can't be said of other book adaptations (aka Twilight).

Back to point, I just spent about $20 for IMAX tickets to see Deathly Hallows part 2 on Saturday. Am I excited? Yes, I am, but am I wetting my pants and doing back flips in anticipation? not quite. It looks to be a good movie and I'm actually really excited to see the final battle scene; I really want to know how the CGI artists rendered what is supposed to be one truly epic battle with all the fiery, dazzling lights goodness the book made it seem like it would be.

Sure, there isn't the ablicious droolability of Thor or the hilarious genius of Bridesmaids (total chickflick but I almost died laughing) but maybe this final Harry Potter movie has some magic to be seen.

Hopefully I'll be pleasantly surprised with how the movie turns out.

All the best,

JP

I Should Do TV

2011-07-08T01:12:00.002-04:00

"Aww, you're so cute, you should be in front of the camera doing commercials rather than behind the counter"

"My granddaughter would love you, you two should meet"

"How could I say no to that smile?"

"You're so charming, I usually don't buy this much stuff but you do something to people"

So, what do these four comments have in common?

A. They all occurred at work
B. They were all spoken by women 40 years old+
C. I responded to them with the semi-awkward "I'm flattered" laugh
D. All of the above

ding ding, answer D is correct.

So I guess I'm destined to being the next Anthony Sullivan in my lifetime?

Brilliant!

Greeeaaaattt.

See you in 10-15 years on your living room's 3-D hologram TV; I fully expect that you'll buy whatever I'm pitching.

JP

Casey Anthony Trial Verdict

2011-07-05T19:01:00.003-04:00

Ahhh, so the trial of the decade has finally come to an end...and as the verdict was passed I was....napping? True, oddly enough. Sorry, eating an entire pizza from California Pizza Kitchen does that to you.

Google news feeds, twitter feeds and facebook statuses ring loudly with shouts of "what the fuck?", "that bitch deserves to die for what she did", and "no justice for Caylee" and all the cable news networks sound like they are reporting the apocalypse. So, what does this not guilty verdict mean for the rest of us? Well, really, nothing. Now hold on before you decide to have me tarred and feathered and then pressed or drawn and quartered (your choice of course). The Casey Anthony trial really isn't anything special per se. Really, the only reason we know so much about it and why the media reports on it so much is because Caylee Anthony was a pretty, White 2 year old whose mother happened to be a partying and not terribly responsible mother, qualities we despise in American culture for understandable reasons. There are dozens if not hundreds of similar situations playing out in similar manners across the United States and the world for that matter at this very moment, affecting disproportionately minority and impoverished populations. Do you honestly think that this case is truly special? Sorry to say, hardly.

I can imagine what you're thinking right now, "JP, you're a dumbfuck, how can you be so cold and heartless?" Well, dear reader, I'm sorry you feel that way, and I can say I am hardly a dumbfuck; sure, I may not be the next Tesla, Einstein or Hawking, but If I can make it in to one of the most selective schools on the East coast and in the world for that matter, you are hardly justified in calling me so. As for being cold and heartless, your convictions may be more understandable, maybe. I'm not being heartless, callous or any other fun word you could look up in a thesaurus synonymous with those terms, I'm just being objective and realistic in a situation where most people would prefer for me not to be.

Am I shocked that Casey Anthony got off on the charge of murder? Not really. While I am no expert on the case (as I doubt is the vast majority of people probably marching in the streets pitchforks and torches in hand), I had my doubts of the integrity of the prosecution's case. Things was mostly speculation on their part and while Anthony was not exactly the best at casting herself in a good light, the case from the get-go was hardly foolproof (and teh fact that the defence showed that the police could have planted evidence doesn't help). Casey Anthony was hardly a good mother, she lied, she was scared, made stupid decisions and acted irrationally, but I have a feeling that if any of us had to go through what she did (and I pray none of us do) our sympathy for her, or at least our levels of rage towards her would be much more tempered.

This case, if anything is a victory for our judicial system and not a failing. Our judicial system is based on a system of innocence until proven guilt beyond a reasonable doubt. It's that last part which people often forget. Also, trials are based not on the character of somebody or speculation but solid factual evidence. In this trial, it cannot be denied that if Casey Anthony were to be convicted based on her character, she would have been jailed for life back in 2008 and probably would be on death row, but that's not how we do things. If we followed that model, half the United States would be jailed and everyone else would be so afraid of offending their next door neighbor that we'd all be reclusive. The only thing that can be proved in this case was that Casey Anthony did lie to police about what happened to her daughter, was irresponsible, and that she was a bad mother, and I'm sorry for the pitchfork crowd, there is no punishment for that except from social repercussions. The jury did a good job here, they listened, saw the evidence, deliberated and acted with their heads rather than their hearts; and while I rarely am a proponent for that kind of approach in everyday life, in the judicial system of the country I was born and raised in, I do believe they did the right thing, however unpopular.

So what's next? Well, just because this trail is over-ish doesn't mean that the saga is over. Anthony will be facing a few years in jail on misdemeanor charges, but I worry for her once she is let out. Emotions run high when young children die, and when the convicted mother is found innocent, her safety is hardly ensured. When she is let out, I fear some sort of revenge killing from a crazed individual who got too wound up in the trail for their own good. Sad thing is, if something like this did happen, I think the majority response by Americans would be a resounding "meh" or "she deserved it, that bitch", which is a kick in the balls of everything this nation stands for. Justice is important, but we are America, where every human deserves to be treated as a human and that sort of response just shows how blind we can be. Same can be said for the jury to arrived at the not guilty verdict, I fear for them as well. They're under great risk from the same people after Casey Anthony even though they did nothing in terms of harming Caylee. It would be a sad day if anything were to happen to any of these people, not "bitches", "motherfucker's who deserve to burn in hell" or what other derogatory term one could label Casey or the jury with, and it would be a miserable day where I lose my faith in the American people if anyone is killed in revenge of this verdict.

Hate me if you will, tell me I'm going to hell, cut my ears off, break my fingers one by one or use whatever other medieval torture method you prefer, but these are my views and don't for a second think you can change them.

JP

Bittersweet 4th

2011-07-05T02:07:00.001-04:00

Happy Birthday America, it was quite a day, or not really. It was a heavy day more than anything. I didn't wake up until 11, the first time that's happened in a few weeks actually. I made breakfast and pretty much wasted time on the computer for the longest time before forcing my lazy-Monday ass to the gym. On my way out i noticed I missed a call from my mom. Fuck. It's not like I was in trouble; hardly, but she had already called earlier that day so this must mean that she had some news.

To make sense of this we have to rewind for a week or so. Things between my mom and dad have been slowly deteriorating for quite a while, since Winter really when it was finally confirmed my dad was cheating on my mom. Well, the past three weeks or so, things took another major dip that might have reached a conclusion today, America's birthday. I called her back to see what was up and a tired voice said she was coming home from my dad's and that if I wanted to go out and get dinner with just the two of us. That signaled to me that she had some sort of news to share, something I dread since for a while now I had cut contact with my dad to minimal levels and this, inevitably was about him. "Sure" I said and I headed home. I changed, my mom arriving home soon after. It was early still, around 4:30 so she said she was going to go to my cousin Nate's to get Microsoft Office 2010 installed on the laptop I bought for her as an early birthday gift (yes, I did go through with it, it cost a paycheck and then some but she deserves it. I'll go into more detail in a later post). Around 5:30 she got back, new software installed and reserved and calm as any good Asian mother would be before revealing something that was not-so-subtly hidden as some sort of conclusion between my parents.

As always, we couldn't figure out where to eat. It's rather surprising actually considering there are literally hundreds of restaurants near my house with foods from around the world. We slowly cruised light to light, me just looking out the window before suggesting an Indian restaurant me and Maria went to on one occasion. We sat, ordered our food and she began her speech. Put short, it was nothing I hadn't already predicted. They're breaking up, my mom is looking for a lawyer, my dad is being stubborn as usual and is not willing to waver. He essentially is abandoning me and my mom for his mistress in what we believe is in Philadelphia. Fun fact, I might have a half-sibling in Philadelphia as well since my dad didn't deny if there was another child. Haha..ha.......ha.

As always, I remained stone faced as my mom tried to figure out her next plan of action. She doesn't want to tell my grandpa, he's too old for this crap, and probably only one of my aunts will find out. Funny thing is, later this month, she was supposed to go on a 2+ week Eurotrip to Scandinavia with my aunt and cousin on my dad's side. Her now unexplained absence will surely cause a stir; I look forward to hearing what explanation my dad gives. My aunt will probably believe whatever my dad says and will side with him, but my cousin will almost positively side with my mom, he likes her and me too much to be honest.

We talked about other things as our food arrived, but it wasn't too long before I was trying to shove chicken korma, palak paneer and naan into my face in a vain attempt to stymie the conversation. I know my mom was hurting and it hurts me too, but this time around, I think she is finally getting what I've believed and held to be true for months, that she needs to end this unhealthy relationship. Soon the waitress, dressed in an orange sari came to check on us and try to make small talk. We paid our check, left, and life literally went on as if nothing happened. We went grocery shopping, went home and soon we went to go see the fireworks.

I don't live in a big city, I might live near one, but it's the suburbs. We congregated on the lawn of a shopping plaza and waited for 9:30. It was me, my mom and my uncle and cousin, plus some random distant relative of mine that nobody really likes but that's honestly irrelevant. It was your everyday show, boom, flash, boom, flash. An Indian family sitting on the curb behind I was standing kept asking people to move or sit down because they were blocking their view rather than getting off their asses and standing themselves; it pissed me off but I kept reminding myself that it would be wasting energy to confront them. This was the first time for both my mom and I in the 14 years I've lived here that we actually went to see our local fireworks; usually we're traveling to some far off place by now. Actually, this will be the first summer without a "family" holiday ever.

We walked home and things continued to just move on as if nothing happened. We talked about how we hoped our aging terrier didn't make a mess of the house since he's afraid of the slightest loud noise and how I should use the 10 cents off per gallon of gas offer we have built up at the local Safeway the next time I take my car to get filled up. It was so ordinary I got lost. I almost forgot that I just saw a couple thousand dollars of chemicals explode in the air in a colourful display of patriotism. It was so ordinary except for the fact that just how little everything that is happening around me bothers me as little as it should. Am I just so desensitized to it all that it just doesn't mean mean anything to me anymore? Have I grown cold? Or has everything just not hit me yet? Maybe it's on a delay, a few days from now I will snap into my senses and bawl my eyes out, enough to "create a river and then row up it" as an old joke we told back on the crew team as a sarcastic response to an overly dramatized sob-story. Everything is just a blur, everything looks the same, just a grey mass of emotion or lacktherof. It's not that I just don't care, it's just that I don't even know what to think anymore.

So why bittersweet? Well, one would be hard pressed to consider this a happy or even neutral (emotionally at least) event in my life, even if it was expected. It's bittersweet because while things didn't work out as we all hoped it would, at least we can work things out now and move forward and at least try and find some semblance of happiness in the future.

Happy 4th, eh?

Who Am I?

2011-07-02T02:07:00.007-04:00

I am the guy who will stay up until 3AM for no particular reason

I am the guy who gets a thrill from discovering the scooter he had from when he was 12 six years later.

I am the guy who will be nice to you but won't be afraid of defending his beliefs, even if things have to get nasty.

I am the guy who doesn't get angry easily but can summon lightning and thunder and make you quiver with fear if need be.

I am the guy who geeks out about the silliest things

I am the guy who isn't afraid to try something at least once

I am the guy who finds Mario Kart Double Dash, Super Smash Bros Melee and other old GameCube games very entertaining

I am the guy who assigned his car a gender and gave it a name. (Male, Heindrik Conrad)

I am the guy who wishes it were late Autumn all year round

Je suis le garçon qui espère qu'il n'oubliera pas trop de français à l'avenir

I am the guy who has done many disagreeable things even close friends wouldn't even think of me doing

I am the guy who you think is straight until I tell you otherwise

I am the guy who can eat a dozen donuts in one sitting

I am the guy who will never stop posing questions about the world around us

I am the guy who thinks a SUV without 4WD or AWD makes no sense

I am the guy who will fall for someone hard and then feel distraught for an eternity before he gets knocked back to his senses

I am the guy who will not stop working on something until it's perfect in his eyes

I am the guy who actually liked his vegetables as a child

I am the guy who you don't want to get into an argument with about cars

I am the guy who knows how to manipulate your emotions and make you feel great or like absolute shit, and I am the guy who takes pride in this ability even if it seems wrong.

I am the guy who refuses to spend more than $50 for a pair of jeans

I am the guy who will refer to himself in the third person in a blog post :P

I am the guy who is genuinely pretty satisfied with his life

I am the guy who thinks station wagons are actually pretty cool

I am the guy who get's pissed off at people who think the world is constantly scheming against them

I am the guy who believes that his generation is bound to do great things

I am the guy who will always want to row again one day

I am the guy who can and will cook you a four-star three course meal on your birthday "just because"

I am the guy who finds super flamboyant guys annoying and believes they are probably hiding some set of insecurities

I am the guy who thinks the smile is the most attractive feature on a guy

I am the guy who enjoys watching the Food Network, Travel Channel and The History Channel on a regular basis

I am the guy who gets a chill down his spine when I hear the noise of a V8 muscle car accelerating

I am the guy who will stand by his true friends until the end of time

I am the guy who wants to do great things in life

Smithsonian Folklife Festival

I am...me.

All the best,

JP

Teen Wolf

2011-06-27T23:19:00.000-04:00

Nomnomnom

Guilty pleasure of the week: Teen Wolf.

Sci-fi nerdiness, MTV cheesiness, and the abtastic group of Tyler Posey, Tyler Hoechlin, Keahu Kahuanui, and Colton Haynes!?

C'MON!

Sorry I haven't been posting much lately, I've been busy with work and such but I have some ideas for posts lined up and ready to go.

2011-06-25T21:30:00.000-04:00

So....What's the appropriate amount of buffer time before letting a hookup know you want to meet up again?

Just wondering...

Five Thoughts

2011-06-24T00:47:00.001-04:00

1. If dirty blond, hot and ripped UVA guy keeps going to the gym at 10, I might just change my gym schedule to be a hour earlier just so I can drool over him.

Think this, minus the tats. Yeah, he was hot.

2. Late-night gym observation #2, why are 3/4 of the people at the gym late at night Asian?

3. 14 year old kids trying to rock facial hair and especially a trashy semi porn-stache is not attractive, and no girls (or guys for that matter) finds that appealing.

*gag*

4. I've put on about six pounds in a little under two months, but while I might have abs, my chest is still lacking. Getting past the "toned" stage is proving difficult. Damn my Asian genes.

5. Breaking up one large transaction into three smaller transactions just so you can get more free aloe vera travel sets just makes you look cheap and manipulative of the system.

Aaron Carter

2011-06-21T01:21:00.000-04:00

Where in the world did Aaron Carter go? Random question, I know. I never really listened to his music or anything but it just popped into my head a few days ago. Back in the late 90s and early 2000s he was everywhere but he sort of just disappeared.

I know what you're thinking, "JP, why is this important in any way?", well, it's just a curiosu example of how truly ephemeral and fleeting fame can be in our here-and-now culture and views on life. I wouldn't call him a musical icon on the same level of someone like Britney Spears who came from the same era but he's a perfect example of how some people just fade away into the annals of history. He was young, cute and the catchy songs that made tween girls squeal over him, but he fell victim to a disease we all are all infected with, aging. By the mid 2000s he was off the radar. So I wonder, with Aaron Carter disappearing once his cuteness wore off, what's the fate of the modern day equivalent, Justin Bieber? I mean, they are almost the same person, both introduced into the spotlight young, but JB is where Aaron was a few years ago, I can only wonder where JB will be in 3 or 5 years. I honestly doubt his musical career will last much longer but we'll see I guess.

This was kind of a silly post but I have plenty of interesting things that have been happening in the past few days. Let's just say I might have found/entered a friends with benefits relationship. Maybe. Hopefully. hahahaha

Well, on a last note, I made a discovery, AC still makes music! Here's his latest single; it's pretty catchy and I think Justice Crew, the winners of Australia's Got Talent did a cover so that's pretty cool. We'll see how this performs on the charts, if it even charts. Can I ask one question though, why the hell is Flo Rida showing up everywhere? Stop settling for second rate gigs.

Aaron Carter ft Flo Rida - Dance With Me

All the best,

JP

Father's Day

2011-06-19T16:21:00.000-04:00

Once again, home doesn't even feel like home anymore. Can I just run away and see what the world throws my way? I feel trapped in this bubble where everyone is just grey, nobody talks to each other anymore, and I feel like I'm just getting slower with each passing second.

My mom complains she doesn't see me anymore; the problem is, if all I have waiting for me is sitting on the couch all day mindlessly watching Youtube videos, I'd much rather be out exploring the world. It's Father's day, and my dad's in the bedroom watching a Chinese soap while my mom is sitting in the sun room with a blank expression on her face, and here I am wondering why the hell I'm just sitting here.

Honestly, if anything good is to come out of this, my mom needs to stop trying to fix things and just let it go.

I'm going insane.

Retail F-Bomb

2011-06-14T00:44:00.005-04:00

Lessons from the retail and high end home and body care worlds on how to making big sales. Hopefully you can gain some insight and spot some of these tricks of the trade the next time you buy something.

(This is obviously a satire of the retail world, of which I am a part of, but I will not deny the truth behind much of what I'm about to say)

Ingredients:
-Customers and a store

Directions:

1. Strike like lightning: Greet ~~customers~~ valued clients the second they step into the store; it doesn't matter if they look like they're "just looking" or trying to sneak a sample of lotion before running out, they're not getting away that easy. A simple "Hello, how are you" works. This breaks the ice

2. Hook them with pretty numbers: Everyone loves to play the "how low can you go game". The bigger the discount/sale number you can throw, the better. Size matters, and 35% and up is best. Start throwing numbers around right after asking if they need help finding anything.

3. Watch them like an eagle watches its prey: Don't hover too close, but be within earshot in case of questions and always be ready to offer samples and retrieve products; pampering leads to ~~a false sense of security~~ comfort and a greater openness to suggestions of complementary products ~~and spending more money.~~

4. Let the music do it's work: Clients like to browse, if they need your help, they will typically ask; you don't want to come across as overbearing. Let the Ellie Goulding playing over the store speakers work its magic..trust me, it's still a mystery as to how it casts it's spell.

Ellie Goulding: Starry Eyed

Of course you need a Dubstep remix-

Ellie Goulding: Starry Eyed (Jakwob Remix)

5. Smile, Wink, Bieberesque Hairflip- Turn the Charm to 10: When the customer starts taking products off shelves, they are most susceptible to suggestions for complementing products. Getting the hand lotion? Why not try the exfoliating scrub as well? The perfume? Try the reed diffuser for your home (it doesn't have to make perfect sense). It's not guaranteed to work, but I've made it work on plenty of occasions. My units-per-transaction (UPT) and and average total price per sale love me for this.

6. Check them out at Checkout: The products, not the customer. The ringup process can be a grey, dreary moment for the customer, they are about to part ways with their money...and I can personally vouch for 99% of people when I say that people don't like to give up their money. So, strike up conversation, smile, laugh if they make a joke, and always say that one of the products they chose is one of your personal favorites. This doesn't necessarily have to be true, but relatability between client and company is key, and being the final face of the company the customer will see, this is one white lie that I'll let slide. Leave a good impression, keep the charm at 10 and make them feel special (because they are) and they will be much more likely to return for more.

He just found out he qualifies for a free travel bag

7. Shock and Awe: OhhMeeeGeee, guess what! "If you spend $X more, you can get Y for Free". Ding ding ding! You just dropped the retail F-bomb, but a good f-bomb! You say this at the end where you can see the subtotal for sales, and always with an upbeat, almost surprised tone. We run promotions almost constantly where if you purchase at or over a certain amount you get a free gift (typically $50 or $75). Usually I will only say this if they are within $10 of that target goal. The magic of this "shock and awe" is that it's an admittedly sneaky way to get people to spend more money for the promise of getting something for free, typically a cheap-to-produce mini gift set made to look fancy. Starting to notice a theme? Free is good; "free" is god-speak in the retail world.

Sorta like this...except with words and stuff

8. Send them off with kisses and flowers: Okay, maybe not that much fanfare (too expensive), but ask if they would like anything gift wrapped, let them know of any upcoming sales and always end with a "Have a Wonderful Day" done with absolute full eye contact. Sound creepy? Not really, but eye contact shows you're confident in quality and worth of what you're handing over to them in the bag and that you care and give a damn about them. Most people overlook the fact that a loyal customer base is the only way any business stays afloat, so ending on a positive note is always, always, always key.

9. Start the process all over again.

Selling stuff is a science, seriously.

All the best,

JP

300

2011-06-12T23:55:00.001-04:00

Holy crap, where has the time gone? I still remember writing my 100th post but here I am working on my 300th. I originally started this blog back in 2009 as a way to try and say the things I was too scared to ever discuss with anyone, not even my closest friends. Mostly, this consisted about my inner conflict about being gay and what I should do about it. In the handful of years since, I've become much more comfortable with myself and you guys have been there every step of the way; starting with my initial personal acceptance, to my very first coming out to Maria, then eventually to my mom and since then to many of my friends. You also seen me through the home stretch of my high school years, my time with the crew team that I still miss to this day, graduation, my transition into college and now the completion of my freshman year. Each step of the way, I used this blog to share what was going on in my life, any thoughts I had, and if I ever needed some advice, I'd ask it to my readers. You guys have provided some really valuable feedback and some truly kind comments over the years, and even though I haven't met and likely never will meet any of you, I still feel like we're friends.

So, thank you guys for reading the scribblings of this teenager from D.C., I hope you've found my writing something enjoyable and a positive addition to your web surfing days. 300 posts may have come and now passed, but here's to many, many more to come.

All the best,

JP

P.S. - I've added a Formspring box to the sidebar, so please feel free to ask me anything, I'll answer as many questions as I can.

Ocean City

2011-06-09T03:05:00.000-04:00

I really, really want to go to the beach which is odd since I never really liked beaches that much in the past. I was always more of a great-indoors kind of guy. Considering the weather here for the past few days, it's been way to hot to be going outside, but once it falls back into the 80s, I want to go on a weekend trip to Ocean City. The water and beaches this far up the coast aren't particularly good though, more proper for sunbathing than swimming in the ocean, but I've been craving escaping from DC for a little while.

The OC...MD

I wish there was more to do in DC, but alas, even with museums and all that jazz, things do get boring. My search for a second job has been put on pause for the time being but I plan to resume my search soon. I'll just keep going to the gym and finding random things to do to fill my time.

JP

No Homo

2011-06-03T23:33:00.001-04:00

I never understood the necessity of the existstance of the phrase "No Homo". Are some guys really so insecure that they will believe that friends would misinterpret something like "I love you guys" said in a perfectly platonic, amicable sense as sexual? It's not like they're blind or deaf to tone, setting or whatever else would differentiate something to be more intimate in or just friendly. Thankfully, I've noticed that this was mostly a high school phenomena as I've rarely have heard it in college (not to say that there isn't some hate towards gays, because there is). I have a feeling it's mostly a phase kids go through (haven't we heard that somewhere before?) when they just don't fully understand something yet and are just afraid of bring called "gay", especially in the confines of secondary school where labels are especially powerful in determining whether you're one of the "cool" kids or not.

I realize that for closeted guys who use the phrase out of necessity or to hide their true desires, "No Homo" can be painful to say, not outwardly, but on the inside. It's a stupid phrase but at least it's not as widespread as it could be like what happened with "That's so gay".

Well, now I have something I hope you guys will enjoy. Yeah, "No Homo" just became funny. So sit back, relax, and pass the nuts!...No Homo.

Enjoy Your Weekend!

All the best,

JP

That Moment When #1

2011-05-31T02:48:00.004-04:00

Fan of...

That moment when someone unexpected pays you an unexpected compliment and you’re like…

...except I would just get all flustered, turn red and be all embarassed and Asian about it. (Asians know what I mean when I say that)

*reblogged from morefrenchlessrunning.tumblr.com, who reblogged it from -imstillyours.tumblr.com*

Bahahaha

2011-05-31T02:43:00.003-04:00

Smile.

2011-05-29T01:02:00.000-04:00

Everyone seems to be so mad today, so flustered and never satisfied with their lives. Yesterday we had a customer who came in wanting to return a gift she had received and blew a massive hissy fit when we asked her for an ID as per store policy. She complained incessantly about how it was gross invasion of privacy and then when we said we could only give her a store credit, she said she hated the company and would never shop at it again, I swore her hooker-like black eyeliner was going to melt off her wrinkly "I hate my desk job" face.

It's not just people like her, however, that seem to need to adjust their outlook on life a little. The vast majority of people need to stop feeling that the world is constantly working against them and to focus on what they do have rather than what they don't have. I had some great conversations with one of my coworkers tonight; we'll call her Alice. Alice is an older woman, she loves spending time with her grandchildren, gardening and staying active. After the generic questions of "so where do you go to school?" and various questions about my family, we got to talking about more general things.

Alice is a genuinely easy person to talk to; she has this strange quality about her once her quirkiness and exuberance for simple, everyday things mellows. It was 6PM and I still had about three and half hours until we closed; usually I'd be bored out of my mind, but somehow talking with her made time just fly by. It wasn't like we were talking about anything truly exciting, we talked about her garden, how she tries to stay active and harbours a vendetta against Metrobus. She also hates doctors since all they do is make people pop pills to placate their whining. She prides herself in having no major health issues, no high blood pressure or cholesterol and no heart disease, her only problem is a knee which has been a little bothersome which she just blames on wear and tear (she's 64). But one thing she says is her way of staying healthy is that she maintains a positive outlook on life. She doesn't have mountains of riches or anything like that, just satisfaction with what she has, her kids, her home, her health and that she doesn't intend to stop learning and exploring the world around her even after she retires. Finally, one thing she says has kept her as young as she has is that she loves to laugh and smile. "Everybody is so angry all the time, it drives me mad!"

I have to agree with Alice about that; people do need to stop looking at what they lack and what they see as shortcomings about themselves and see what's great about them. Nobody is perfect and expecting perfection every time will only lead to pain when your goals aren't met. While I don't suggest lowering one's standards, I do think people need to learn from their mistakes and simply remember them when they move on and try again the next time. Yeah, I admit all of that sounds hopelessly optimistic, but for the majority of people, I think they should give themselves more credit than they do.

So yeah, sorry I hadn't written in a while, things have just been chugging along pretty calmly since I got home. I'm working part time in MD and am looking for a second job as well to supplement that. Other than that, I'm just taking it easy and reconnecting with friends. I've already met up with Ms. X and a few other people; I really missed them. Well, I hope things are going well in your neck of the woods.

Here's some music to sorta make up for the prolonged absence.

Kap Slap - Till Silvia Saves The World (Swedish House Mafia, Britney Spears and Miike Snow mashup)

This dude rocks, I have a bunch of his songs on my ipod and you can find more of his stuff on his Youtube channel.

Keep it real,

JP

Employ Me!

2011-05-25T01:42:00.000-04:00

Working in Maryland part-time now, looking for a second job in Virginia to also work part-time in on top of the one in MD.

Applying for jobs all day, err'day.

What has my life come to?

You Dress Like a Prostitute

2011-05-21T00:39:00.001-04:00

If I had a dollar for every time somebody has asked me and Maria whether we were together or going out, I'd be able to pay for four years of college, grad school, buy a Volvo, and then have change left over for a nice dinner for two.

Yeah, we're soul mates, but I'm gay and after knowing each other for so long, it would pretty much be incest if we were together. Instead we've developed multiple inside jokes and can make so many lewd, sexual remarks towards each other that it's just funny and no longer offensive...because really uncomfortable looks from eavesdropping strangers is the true mark of friendship, no?

So, Maria, you drrrress...like a Prrrrostitute. (and that's the truth)

Love ya always,

JP

P.S. - Don't let that high school senior get anywhere near you at work, open a can of whoop-ass if necessary.

Summer 2011

2011-05-19T02:06:00.000-04:00

When I was walking across the stage at my high school graduation, I could only think about how quickly my senior year just flew by. I could still remember clearly my first day back, seeing everyone again after two months of break and preparing for that final push before college apps were due. Now that I've finished my freshman year of college, I can't help of feel the exact same way.

I remember my first class ever was International Business with Professor P, he was a hilarious exchange professor who spoke fast with a heavy Spanish accent and a go-easy but you-will-learn-quickly teaching style. He turned out to be one of my favorite professors of the year, for being so friendly and personable, plus his easy as fuck final helps his cause too. The rest of my professors were all pretty good, no one can be singled out as "bad" or "fantastic" for that matter, but given some of the horror stories I've heard from my friends at other schools, I can't complain. Also, with final grades for the semester finally in, I can report that second semester has not damaged my GPA and it shall remain steady for the time being, good enough for me.

I've made some great friends too this past year, and I'll miss seeing them over the summer but it's good to know that we'll be back together come Fall. In the mean time I'll be sharing stories with friends as they all begin to come back home. Stories about classes, parties, romance or the lack thereof and other things from our first year of college are high on the list of things we've all been waiting to gather and talk about.

In addition to relaxing I'm also working this summer; Maria hooked me up with a job over in Maryland where she will also be working once or twice a week. I can say it's a retail job but I won't be going any further than that. This will be my first real job ever so I'm pretty excited. I can finally make some money and maybe start get myself that pair of Sperry Top Siders I've been eying and a cheap project car later on. In July my parents, aunt and cousin will be heading out on a 16 day Northern European vacation/cruise but I decided to opt out. I wouldn't feel comfortable asking for over two weeks off, and while going to Sweden and Scandinavia has been a dream of mine for quite a while now, I'd rather put it on hold and go when I'm actually relaxed and after all the family drama is worked out. Instead, I'll work, workout and enjoy being in familiar surroundings again, that is unless I decide to take an impromptu road trip which is an idea I've been tossing around the past few days.

Despite the whole Eurotrip bummer, I do hope to travel a little bit. I've talked to M though and our mutual friend's parents have a beach house up in Jersey they'd be willing to let us use some time this summer which is cool. Also, Maria's parents have a timeshare down in Orlando they've already booked that me, Maria and a potentially a few other friends might take advantage of and go to Disney for a week. I think the last time I went to Disney was when I was in middle school so that would be brilliant if the logistics of the whole thing could be worked out. That would be the hurdle with most plans, while everything sounds great in concept, actually making things happen is another story, we'll see.

So yeah, compared to previous years of exploring the world and such, this will look to be a pretty grounded, quaint three months. I think it will be for the better in the end, after a whirlwind year, I could use the feeling of stability, of solidarity that is hard to come by on a college campus where everyone seems to be just running around searching for things to do, like bees on the constant hunt for more flowers to make golden honey. I'm hoping to be surprised this summer though, I hope something, or someone will take my life on a detour and show me something new and exciting. I can't wait to see what the future has in store for me, yet I'm also nervous; huh, funny how that works, eh?

All the best,

JP

Freshman No More

2011-05-15T18:24:00.000-04:00

I decide to swim in the fountain after my final accounting exam and slip and nearly smash my head open on solid granite due to a failed running-start attempt. Oh exam gods, I'll be sure to temper my excitement next time.

Move out went well, lots of hugging, lots of wishing well, and after getting to Maryland and my dad's house, lots of Chinese food. Oh how I have missed those flavours.

Sorry for the shortness of this post but I'm busy and wanted to quickly post an update. I promise I'll be doing a reflection in the near future.

I don't surf....

Goodbye freshman year, hello summer 2011.

All the best,

JP

Anonymous

2011-05-13T14:16:00.001-04:00

I posted this on my school's version of Post Secret and it many more responses than I expected it would. It was interesting to read what other people had to say though, and kind of reassuring too.

7 Comments

Anonymous

Posted May 9, 2011 at 3:58 pm

Permalink

I used to think that way. Then I realized that “gayer” acting guys are actually a lot more secure with themselves, which I find really sexy.

_____
Anonymous

Posted May 9, 2011 at 4:42 pm

Permalink
The coveted “straight” gay guy. Well looks can be deceiving. I can be a pretty gay guy, but I love sitting in my sweat pants and going to hooters with my boyfriend for beer and wings. Sometimes people surprise you.

_____

Anonymous

Posted May 9, 2011 at 8:32 pm

Permalink

Agreed, “gayer” guys aren’t necessarily more secure. A lot of the ones I know are LESS secure, they feel they have to do all these things and dress a certain way and not eat enough just because they’re gay. Guys who are comfortable with their masculinity and their sexuality are HOT.

____
Anonymous
Posted May 10, 2011 at 11:30 am

Permalink

Certainly a tough thing to find, but there are plenty of us sports loving gays out there. Keep your head up and it all works out eventually!

______
Anonymous

Posted May 10, 2011 at 4:39 pm

Permalink

Go to Nellie’s. It’s a gay sports bar after all :p

_____
Anonymous

Posted May 10, 2011 at 8:11 pm

Permalink

Thats me, and I thought there were no guys who were looking for something like that

_____
Anonymous

Posted May 10, 2011 at 11:25 pm

Permalink

To: “That’s me”
There’s tons of us out there who are looking for “yous”

And now I need to find some of these people.....

3:48AM

2011-05-11T03:48:00.000-04:00

Bloody finals just won't end!

iudsfdbghekfus!

**correction: I just got back to my dorm...it's 6:29 and the sun is rising. Yay allnighter?

Distractions

2011-05-07T20:47:00.002-04:00

Click to Enlarge

It's like I'm not gay enough for them sometimes.

Head West

2011-05-06T13:52:00.001-04:00

Sometimes I drift off into some fantasy while I'm studying for finals and imagine myself saying "fuck it", tossing my books in the corner, jumping into a Mustang Convertible (5.0, manual, always.) and just driving west.

I wouldn't stopping for anything; I would just looking forward towards the horizon, reveling in the mystery of it all. I'll feel the small knot in my stomach from not knowing what lies around the next corner, over the next hill and through the next tunnel, craving that feeling more and more, searching for a new side road to explore.

I would drive until the tank runs dry and then until I run out of money and can't pay for any more gas. I would feel the sun on my skin, the wind brushing my hair and the sound of a big V8 under the hood. It's marriage of man and machine at its finest.

Then after imagining all of this I would snap back into reality and see that I don't have a Mustang, I don't have the money, I don't have the ability to be carefree like that, at least not now. It's not even because finals are in full swing, it's because I have more important things to concentrate on in my life. Schoolwork for one, but also helping to care for my family and being there for my mom. I told her I wasn't getting a job because I needed to contribute to the family finances, that was a half-lie. I want to be less of a burden on her, she has enough to worry about with my grandpa and dad and all. I need a job to be more financially independent but also because my main goal this summer is to make enough money to buy my mom a laptop for her birthday.

Every year I would get her roses, a card, something small, but all along she really has deserved more. She's been wanting a laptop for a while now, but spending hundreds of dollars just isn't in the picture for her. I don't care if I do end up working in the produce department of a supermarket six days a week to do this, but I've made a promise to myself that by August, I will have a big wrapped box waiting on her desk when she wakes up.

Job! (Maybe)

2011-05-05T14:38:00.001-04:00

I just got a phone interview from one of the three places I applied to for a job this summer. There is hope!

Good karma is coming around.

:)

3 2 1

2011-05-05T06:38:00.000-04:00

In Response to "An Open Letter"

"In Response: It’s not like I didn’t realize that there were people also celebrating American morale and all that jazz. And yes, there were choruses of the Star Spangled Banner at the White House as well. I was there too and I saw as well. I’m not blind, deaf, or dumb to not realize that there are two sides to any matter and there are multiple opinions/takes on any matter. I saw other responses to the scene in , cliche as it might be (it’s also the only place we can legally put anything up). I saw both positive and negative responses to the boxes and to be honest, I didn’t really care what responses we were getting. People will be people and they will feel whatever the fuck they want to.
And yes, the intent was vague. What to do? It was a slapdash thing that formed in the hands of others, not even me. Sure, I ordered the boxes and I did want to make something, but I wasn’t out to make a political statement of any kind. Nobody saw the process behind what happened but it happened like this:Three kids, too many cardboard boxes. One kid (me) wanted to make art. Simple as that. I had no message other than the desire to share something close to me and it’s that feeling I get when I make something I deem beautiful. It’s a feeling, an essence, it has no voice, meaning, or qualification. The other kid wanted to make art and wanted the adventure. Another simple motive, and that’s the thing about art - it’s not about politicizing an image or a word, it’s about PASSION. It’s something essential.
The third kid wanted to say something loud and shout it over the rooftops. This last kid came over to my room just as I was in a discussion with a mutual friend about the reactions to Osama’s death, and how we both weren’t happy how SOME people were reacting to it (not all, I do realize that global statements are always false). He joined in the conversation and his passion took him away. A different kind of passion than ours. He wanted this project to be about the negative reactions. Before I even knew it he had called up his friend who was going to put up posters anyway on the matter, and hours later, we were all working together on something that I hadn’t pictured at all. I don’t deem those boxes to be art. There was nothing artistic about it and it was far from being my baby - I already said that. I was just there with my boxes and my spray paint and my tape and was roped into putting out a message that I agreed upon but wasn’t necessarily something I felt that needed to be gotten out. I already saw that there were people who could see both sides of the spectrum, too. I also knew that things couldn’t necessarily be changed, and it’s not as if an ambiguous clump of boxes could do it justice. There are too many gaps and exclusions in the discourse to portray the picture as it ought to be. But, isn’t that how it always is with anything? Gaps and gray areas, ripe for misinterpretation and misunderstandings. Kind of like how you interpreted my motives and actions, dear.

Yes, I ordered boxes that were essentially free, but they are NOT paid for by taxpayer dollars. Perhaps you would like to do some research before you toss accusations. This is from the USPS site:

[http://www.usps.com/communications/newsroom/postalfacts.htm]
A service that they cannot afford? I think not. The reason they have this service is BECAUSE they can afford it.
Let’s talk shit on the artist now, right? I didn’t even get to make art, and thus the artist is not involved. Even want to talk shit on the message that was put out? It was the free speech zone and everyone has a right to have their opinions heard if they so wish to put them out - my friends wanted to say something and I helped them out. I agreed with some of the things that they said AND NOT ALL (as I also explained) but just because I happened to help them say it doesn’t mean that I automatically am implicated. I don’t like shouting my opinions from rooftops, I tend to keep them to myself, or at least, obscure them so that only those with their ears to the ground can hear them (as I said that I like my messages to be abstract). Sue me because I like to help, sue me because I enjoy working in the dark of the night and doing things that get my heart pounding. Sue me for being there and wanting to feel alive, to feel involved in something raw, and human, and flawed.
I’m no truth-bearer. I’m just a person with opinions and desires and emotions. My opinions were not exactly portrayed in that collaborative effort (there was more than one person’s opinion in that, and not all agreed) and my desires were not even carried out. My emotions? Well, like I said before, they were satisfied. I wasn’t ecstatic since I didn’t get what I want, but satisfaction has nothing to do with elation.
You’re a nice guy and all, but do me a favor and next time you have a problem about something I do, say it to my face. Maybe just reading my blog and seeing my pictures that I put up isn’t enough, because oftentimes I don’t take the time to write out everything. Oftentimes, I say these things in my head and keep it to myself because I hadn’t thought it would be necessary to defend my honor.
Honestly, I’m insulted. INSULTED I tell you, from the very core of my essence. You’ve turned this into something political and very black and white, and I resent that. We’ve been good friends and I would have liked to think that you’d realize by now that there’s a little more to me. Your entire post gets at the core of the issue, that yes there are two sides, but I do realize that. My opinions were only on that half of the people that didn’t see the two sides. So we’re basically on the same terms of the matter. A response is usually to something that we deem is problematic, not to the things that people are doing right, anyway.
a;lskdjf
I don’t really know why I’m bothering to respond to this. I’ll just say it to your face, too, tomorrow. I think this is good to put up in text for you so you can understand how much you’ve offended me, because I’m not going to say that to your face. You have no right to make blanket statements about art or artists, or what they do or why they do it. Don’t try to confine me within some narrow labels as an insensitive, selfish artist, blind to reality.
I’m a little fucking more than that. "

My Response:

I really do hope you realize I wasn't directly trying to insult you or make any blanket statement about artists. My own friends who I care about dearly made those remarks, and I have no right as to try and say what they believe is right or wrong. Anyways, I said I would share some of /their/ views on the project, and NEVER did I once say that they expressed my OWN views. Maybe things got confusing due to how I incorporated the quotes, blame my writing style, it’s as casual and as far from elegant as it comes.

The matter of the fact is that I became involved in that discussion only after one of my friends got upset, and if you would care to actually read the long list of comments left, I tried to actually defend your own position by trying to explain it wasn't some black and white protest to the killing of Bin Laden that my friends happened to believe when he came across the boxes. If you feel insulted because you thought that I was trying to aim some attack at you personally or artists in general, then I pity the fact that you let your own blind rage prevent you from seeing I was just passing on their responses, nothing more.

I will apologize for not knowing the full back story of the project and attributing it to you exclusively. Given the extent of my knowledge I should not have assumed what I had. But I will repeat, never once did I intend to insult you or anyone in particular. If I expected anyone in would have been able to see past this, I would have expected that to be you, but I guess we're in the same boat when it came to misinterpreting each others actions.

Separately, would you like to know why I bit my tongue about the boxes? It's because if living in a household where bickering and arguments are the norm has taught me one thing, it's that sometimes, things are better left unspoken. Do you realize how tired I am of having to listen to stories of my parents arguing back and forth from my aunts? There have been times when I honestly DREAD the thought of having to go home in a few weeks. So you know what, when I heard you ordered 500 boxes from USPS, yeah, I was irked by that, but in the grand scheme of things, I couldn't honestly give a crap about it. So I said nothing. However, I needed somewhere to share some thoughts where I felt I could be completely open about things I would not talk about in person, so I turned to my blog. Obviously, maybe I can't be completely open as long as people I know don't realize that I use my blog for venting are reading my scribblings. You extol free speech, well, what I said on my blog was exactly that, my opinion plain and open. If you’re upset, well I’m sorry then. If you’re going to let this honestly trivial matter built on a misshapen mound of misattributed beliefs and me blowing off some steam in what I assumed to be a private domain take down our friendship, well, then I don’t know what to say, hun.

You said you want to talk, sure, I'm 100% behind that. Talking behind computer screens will never lead to any resolution. I’ll be back on campus around 3 today. I look forward to trying to work things out.

By the way, you should know that a business that has already borrowed over $10 billion in treasury loans and is nearing its $15B limit, has reported multi-billion dollar losses consistently for the many years, has been resorting to cutting service in addition to the over 105,000 full time workers it has already laid off in a desperate attempt to reduce operating costs obviously can’t afford to provide a service where it expects its supplies to be used to generate revenue through postage, only to find that those supplies are not to be used in the way they were intended. Those boxes were only “free” because they expect you to fill them, pay money for postage stamps and so they can get the money from that and ship your stuff. So let’s say $10 shipping revenue from each box times 500 boxes, there we have $5000 in lost revenue, and that was being conservative. Oh, regarding that government line of credit, guess who indirectly ends up helping fund it? Taxpayers. Finally, for the icing on the cake, let’s not forget the over $90B in unfunded pensions, health insurance and other liabilities that it owes to workers and other parties. The Postal Service is broke, hun.

An Open Letter

2011-05-03T16:20:00.007-04:00

If you're reading this ________, I feel I should pass along some responses to your box project from last night. I saw your pictures from last night's art project; I know of your motives, your reasoning and the questions you hoped to raise, yet I'm in the minority in posessing this knowledge. As a side-note, your choice of location was fitting, the free speech center of campus was the smart albeit cliché choice. Granted, I haven't ventured over but I know of plenty of people who have. Your bloody corpses, soldiers and civilians are definitely causing a stir and people are stopping to look, but beneath all the curious glances is a sizable amount of people who are quite upset and enraged. You probably were hoping to incite some outcry from the campus community; the purpose of art is often to do just that, to make people think, experience strong emotions, et cetera. If you haven't heard some responses already, here's one.

"to the jackasses who laid out the boxes resembling corpses and put up the "Don't Shoot I'm human" signs in Red Square: go put your little "art exhibit" up in New York City. Come on...do it. I DARE you. Let's see what they think." -J

I'm all for expressing one's views through whatever creative means one chooses, but sometimes I feel there is a time and a place. Yes, I questioned the morality and ethics of celebrating a death, but beyond that, it should be realized that we aren't simply celebrating a death, but there are rather many more implications as well.

"Now, let me qualify one thing—We were not celebrating the end of a human life; rather, we were celebrating the end of this man’s grip on American morale. Our inability to capture or even find this man had a major, negative effect on both civilian and military morale. With the mission carried out by the brave Navy Seals in Pakistan, we not only ended this, but proved to the world that if you are responsible for the mass murder of 3000 innocent citizens of our nation, you will pay for it. Hundreds of college students gathered together in front of the White House last night, bursting out into the Star Spangled Banner, carrying flags, and chanting “Thank You, Troops” over and over again. It was an incredible feeling of togetherness and coming together as Americans that I will never forget...

...I wish people could look behind the physical actions of this to the more symbolic implications. But if all someone sees in that rally in front of the White House was rejoicing at the end of a human life, then he or she has grievously misunderstood or ignored the fact that this man, who has been public enemy number one for most of our conscious memory (for those of us who are eighteen or thereabouts) is no more, that this man, who supported and publicly encouraged the slaughter of 3000 innocent people on our own soil, is no more. The liberal in me wishes we could have taken him alive, but I also recognize the importance of this symbolism." -V

Even if the idea of questioning the morals of celebrating a death, questions and concerns still arise.

" I think I agree with you in their intent, but they clearly fail at making any kind of statement because their intent is so vague. If they're protesting the actual killing, I don't have words to describe my reaction" -H

I'd be the first person to shout out that there are always two sides to every argument, point of view and belief. Like night and day, salty and sweet, good and evil, you can never have one without the other. Congratulations on achieving your goals and creating the art you love to your core. I'm also glad to see you found a use for those USPS boxes, but I must express my views on one thing which I am less supportive of.

I hope you're happy about spending taxpayer money to help fund your project and essentially stealing your supplies as well. Those boxes are not free like you claim. They have a purpose, what you are doing is wasting them if anything. If you want to do anything like this again, I suggest you buy them yourself, it's wasteful to spend the money others. In addition, please no bullshit about "it only cost $10 to produce those boxes". The time, manufacturing, processing, shipping, printing and human labour costs that all have been put to null for the purpose of "art" is not acceptable no matter the price. Be courteous to the USPS and the people who help fund it, namely us through the treasury loans that they have to take out because they are already in dire financial straits. They have already laid off thousands, are planning to further cut services and raise prices because they can barely stay afloat. What you were doing is taking advantage of a service they cannot afford in the first place, ordering 500 boxes is rubbing salt into the wound at its core. If you want to be a true artist, spend your own money to buy your supplies. If the money isn't there, I suggest waiting until the means come along.

Voila, my five cents on that. Are my concerns impertinent in the grand scheme of things? maybe. Is my business school persona showing itself? probably. Am I trying to be the friend who just wants to look out for others. definitely.

Don't let others tell you who you are, but be sure to be a responsible individual in a world where the concepts of responsibility and social riotousness are deteriorating at an unsettling rate.

JP

12:30AM Run to the White House, nbd

2011-05-03T00:08:00.001-04:00

Unless you've been living under a rock for the past 24 hours, you should know that Osama Bin Laden is dead, or as Fox News put it on their website for a good 30 minutes "Usama Bin Landen Dead Fox News Confrims". Now the beauty of going to school in DC is that at 12:30AM I have the ability to go for a late night run to the White House for a massive rally. Plenty of patriotic songs were sung as were chants of "U-S-A" were shouted that night; plus, I probably ended up on at least 3 news reels.

Here are some pictures

So yeah, pretty intense night, plus I got a nice run out of it. I will say it is rather strange to be celebrating the death of an individual, especially thinking that they were doing the exact same after the attacks in 2001. I'm not saying that people shouldn't celebrate, it is excellent news, but just because Bin Laden is dead doesn't mean the terrorists are going to fall apart. His role was likely minimal and symbolic if anything, their resolve to inflict more damage will only be greater now. It's actually rather scary if you think about it.

Nevertheless, this is something that Americans should feel proud of and hopefully this will help provide closure for many of the 9/11 families across the globe.

Today also marks the last day of classes of the semester and now begins my study period before finals begin next week. I'm going to start moving my stuff home soon and begin to live like a hermit in my room as 24 hour quiet hours are now in place. Damn, my first year in college is almost done. Time flies, time flies.

All the best,

2011-05-01T16:23:00.001-04:00

Tequila

2011-04-29T22:19:00.000-04:00

Fucking epic day....I just wish I remembered more of it.

Letters That Will Never Be Sent

2011-04-28T17:28:00.003-04:00

Dear Y,

Sorry, you really aren't that funny and really don't like you that much. I smile and occasionally feign a giggle to be courteous, but in reality I can't get over the fact that you look like that troll face meme; seriously, it's uncanny. I honestly don't understand how or why everyone would be so obsessed with you. Your sarcasm is bordering annoying and your "humour" doesn't make sense half the time. I seriously can't believe how much you look like that creepy ass meme, I sense a Halloween costume coming up. Also, stop talking about politics and how the world is going into ruin because of Jersey Shore and Donald Trump at the dinner table, really? really? Calm the hell down.

Regards,

JP

_________________________

Dear U,

Get off your man period and stop being a pissy, moody teenage girl. It's starting to get on my nerves. I don't know if I did something to offend you or anything but you seriously need to quit it with the one word answers and cold shoulder treatment. Tomorrow is University Day, we'll all be drunk off our asses tomorrow so please, some civility between us in the mean time would be greatly appreciated. I don't intend to apologize for anything if that's what you're hoping for, mostly because I don't know what I would even apologize for.

Sincerely,

JP

__________________________

Dear G,

I kind of want to hook up with you before the year is over. We've locked eyes a few times and I see you all the time, but we never really were friends, mostly acquaintances. Probably the longest conversation we had was at the beginning of the year that one night when we were still new and tipsy, going from apartment to apartment looking for places to go and things to see. I see you at the gym relatively often and would like to see the results of all those hours of cardio and lifting. So what do you say, you game for some fun?

Best,

JP

_______________________

Dear I,

Yes, I am gay if that is what you were wondering during last night's interview. I kind of want to know what you were circling so furiously on your note pad too last night. You didn't really say much but I did notice you staring at me during the entire interview. I don't want to pull a Mark and get with a senior staffer for a position on the board though. If you could convince the rest however to give me a position, it would be greatly appreciated.

Sincerely,

JP

_________________________________

Dear W,

I honestly have no idea why you're with that guy. You're a nice girl; you're funny, considerate, so why would you be with him? I wouldn't say this to you in person but you seriously could do better. He's a douche, rude as fuck, crude and overall not the kind of guy you need. Sorry if that hurts, but it's true. If you're using him for his dick or something well that's up to you, but I can guarantee you in a few years, you're probably going to look back on this whole relationship and wonder why you ever did what you did.

Cheers,

JP

_____________________________

I must say, it feels nice to get all that off my chest.

What Could Have Been

2011-04-26T23:24:00.003-04:00

Have you ever felt out of place before? You get that weird feeling in the pit of your stomach which makes you uneasy and feel like everyone is watching your every step and breath you take. It's strange and also kind of scary to realize that classes end in only two days for me and then all that stands between me and the end of my first year of college are a few finals. Comparing how things were in high school and now shows brings into view things that should have been obvious form the get go, yet still makes me feel uneasy all the same.

Probably something that I realize which made me feel rather uneasy is how competitive things have been for the few months I've been here. Back in high school things were different to say the least. I was in the top 5% of my class, maybe even in the top 15 or 20 students in the class of 2010 but now the playing field has changed drastically. I may have graduated with the cords, plaques, seals and medals that many others have but our backgrounds and level of work to get all of these is so different from my peers. While I came from a public school, and a pretty competitive one at that, the majority of people I know come from high level private schools where the expectations were likely higher than I had ever experienced. With graduating class sizes of 40, 30 or even 20, a quarter of which are sent to Ivy League schools or Tier 1 private universities, compared to my class size of over 600 and what was considered a great year when maybe a dozen made it to the Ivies, it's a big difference to say the least.

I've talked about this back in the beginning of the year in September or maybe October; I needed to adjust my expectations for myself. I knew I wouldn't be able to pull off the straight A's, 4.4 GPA and juggle extracurriculars like I used to, but just how much I would have to adjust my expectations hadn't become apparent to me until recently. While previously at the top, I'm now middling at best, and likely at the lower range of middling in all honesty. This semester I'm hoping to pull off 3 Bs and maybe, just maybe, two As. Seeing people seemingly float through classes I'm struggling in is like getting a cup of ice water thrown in my face every day; it's a daily wake up call for me and something I'm still not completely used to. My mom has always told me to just do my best and be proud of your work, no matter that grade you get or what other people have to say about it. I work hard and push myself like I always have, sometimes the expectations are just higher than you expect.

It's also fun in some convoluted way to think how if I did go to some of the other state schools I got accepted to how things would be different. I'd probably be closer academically to where I was in high school and I would still see many of my old friends, yet looking at everything I've experienced here in D.C. I also see how I would have been so sheltered. You don't know what you would be missing until after you've experienced it first hand and look back at the memories you've created. Still, I wonder how things would be different. Would it have been easier? simpler? more interesting? less interesting? What would I be like if I hadn't met Maudry, Mark, Liz and the countless others who I'm close friends with now?

Even with the difficulties however, I don't regret one bit choosing to go to the school I'm attending. I've met some great people, made friends with people from all kinds of backgrounds and have had some surprisingly good professors. Plus, even if I'm close to home, I still feel like I'm a world away. It's like beyond the front gates exists a whole new land, oceans and plains away from Northern Virginia even I really am just a metro ride away. It's the little touches that put the icing on the metaphorical cake that is my college experience to far.

Yeah, I've had my breakdowns, my triumphs and my "what the fuck?" moments but I wouldn't trade it for anything.

I regret nothing.

JP

Fuck Yeah Happy

2011-04-23T22:39:00.003-04:00

I've linked things to this blog before but I still can't stress how much I love it:

fuckyeahhappy.tumblr.com

Enjoy and Happy Easter guys!

With love from New York,

JP

Weirdo

2011-04-21T02:53:00.001-04:00

Yes, I'm ~~kinda~~ really weird at times, and I have my quirks when it comes to things I like, dislike and occasionally get really obsessed about. I also have some things about myself that I just don't really share with others for one reason or another. Maybe it's time for y'all to learn a little more about my cooky side. Don't judge.

1. I'm more of a Southern boy on the inside than I'm willing to admit. I use "Y'all" in everyday conversation and could live off fried chicken, greens, and mashed potatoes. Plus, I find a light southern twang of an accent really attractive.

2. I will eat almost anything with hot sauce. I've doused entire breakfasts with hot sauce, put it on sanwiches and even straight onto bread. It's delicious. I do have a high spice tolerance which probably helps but what can I say, I like it hot.

3. Nerdy things excite me, like, a lot. I recently found someone who makes periodic table of elements cufflinks. and I'm seriously considering getting a set. I've also considered getting beakers to use as pencil holders and in my sophomore year of high school I made a Pi Day shirt with the first 20 digits painted in yellow on the back of a black t-shirt. Yeah, I was that cool.

Zachary Quinto: one hot ass nerd

4. If I could change one thing about me it would be either to get rid of my allergies or my lactose intolerance. Currently all the pollen in the air is making me miserable; I'm sneezing, my eyes itch like none other and my nose is stuffed, but the fact that I can't have more than a glass of milk a day sucks year 'round. I know soy and other random kinds of milk exist but it's not the same, no matter how much you can try and convince me. Lactose free milk also just tastes off to me, so no.

5. For the longest time a few years ago I thought Tory Belleci from the Mythbusters was pretty hot; come to think of it, I still do.

Tory Belleci, also a hot (science-y) nerd

6. I will take any excuse to dress up. Why else did I go to the IRC formal? Well, maybe not only to dress up, but it did play a role. Suits look good on guys and sometimes it's just fun to wear a suit just to mak eyourself feel good. Nothing wrong with that.

7. I secretly want to own a truck one day. A V8 and four wheel drive are a must.

8. If I learned one thing from modeling in the Spring Fashion show, it would be that looking "moderately displeased" has a very wide and rather hilarious range of intepretations.

9. I get easily annoyed if others overlook details and have to scramble last second to fix something, same goes with last minute changes of plans.

10. I fully intend to buy a 1993-1994 Volvo 940 when I have the money (hopefully by the end of summer?). I have no idea why I love those old brick shaped cars, let alone something so associated with early 90's suburban soccer mom culture. Neverthless, I think they're charming and attractive in an unexplainable way. Plus, they're durable as hell, reliable, and easy to work on which I intend to take advantage on and learn more about how engines work and maintaining one.

Boxy, but good

So yeah, some little known facts about me. I have plenty more things that are kind of out there but I'll save those for another day. Easter break has finally started and I leave for New York tomorrow so I hope to put on some pictures as soon as I can. Enjoy your week guys.

All the best,

JP

Final Stretch

2011-04-19T17:41:00.001-04:00

Weekend Update:

Friday: (repost)
-went home and got dinner with Maria at Eden Center
-We ate at this Vietnamese restaurant, the Pho was okay, kinda bland but the spring rolls were delicious
-Bought asian desserts and banh mi sandwiches at a bakery and made crude jokes
-went back to her house, we watched a Brazilian telenovella dubbed in Spanish that takes place in India
-All I know is that a train exploded and there is a misidentified body involving a polo player
-We then watched Ghost Hunters, not creepy at all and I fell asleep on her chair
-Went home, fell asleep on the couch until 4AM and then crawled to bed

Saturday:
-Got a hair cut and went back to campus
-Studied for my accounting exam for a few hours and then got ready for an International Relations Club formal
-Met up with some friends on the first floor and headed over to the venue
-I ate half my weight in chocolate, there was a massive chocolate fondue pot
-Danced to a mix of top 40, techno and dubstep until 11
-Went back to my dorm to take a break and then headed to the afterparty
-First batch of jungle juice was disgusting mango flavoured stuff, the cranberry one was much better
-Ran into Liz and a few other people, Prefrosh accepted applicant overnighters were with them
-Found out the kid was also going to be in the Business School, score!
-Was getting pretty tipsy, my friend A was pointing out all the gay guys at the party
-Got some beer from the keg, did a sake bomb
-I was pretty drunk and enlisted the help of A to help introduce me to this one guy, I find out he's a senior
-Aborted the plan in the end, he was kinda short (shorter than me)
-Went out to get 2AM pizza, I bought two for some reason being the fiscally responsible drunk I am
-On the walk back I complained how the business school has the stigma of being lazy bums which is totally not true and annoys the hell out of me
-Get back to the dorm and devour the first massive slice
-I go to bed

Sunday:
-Wake up and immediately start studying accounting for my exam Monday
-Studied more accounting, and more, and more
-And more.
-Went to bed...exciting day, I know

Monday:
-Woke up early and took the practice exam again
-Skipped my Ethics to study a little more
-Went to Sociology only to find out my really nice but teaching inept professor talk about her rabies bitten cat being finally let out of Katine after six months tomorrow (Tuesday)
-Accounting was cancelled because of the exam so me and a few people went out to indulge in some greasy goodness and order take out chicken wings, fries and soda
-Accounting exam was in a conference on an 80 foot long elliptical table, it was weird, but the chairs were so comfortable
-Surprisingly got an answer for every question, whether the work is right or not is another question. I was surprisingly calm compared to other people
-Went to the gym for one and a half hours, I erged, lifted and did some ab work. I felt less guilty about the chicken wings
-Came back and started my Business Stat homework over a Whiskey Palmer (1 part whiskey, six parts Arnold Palmer over ice, delish)
-Around 3:30 I was done with work and ate that second slice of pizza I bought while watching Good Eats on my computer, guilt came back haha
-Finally went to bed.

Yeah, so my weekend had quite a strange mix of activities but a boy's got to have some time. Work Hard, Play Harder, no? Tomorrow is my last day of classes before Easter break, mom's picking me up and then Thursday night I'm off to visit my friend Christine up in New York for a few days; it's going to be sick! I'm taking a bus but it supposedly has Wifi and that jazz but I'll probably just sleep. I just finished applying to work at a few local Starbucks' over the summer, their application was half resume stuff and half personality exam, makes sense since it's just an interaction-heavy job but still kinda weird. I also finished my app to be on the Board of Directors of a social entrepreneurship club on campus and signed up to be a move-in aid some fall which lets me move in early and beat the rush and a free T-shirt, score!

Other things making me happy - Glee is back tonight! Yes! I know what I'm doing tonight.

Have a good one guys,

JP

High Expectations

2011-04-16T17:57:00.002-04:00

lolz

Friday

2011-04-16T15:37:00.000-04:00

Instead of staying for one of the the biggest all-night campus events of the year I went home, ate Vietnamese food with Maria, had Asian desserts, watched a Brazilian telenovella dubbed in Spanish which takes place in India, asked Maria what was going on, still didn't understand said telenovella, watched Ghost Hunters, and fell asleep on the couch before waking up at 4AM and crawled into bed.

I regret nothing.

Une Vie Compliquée

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