Thursday, January 3, 2013

Happy New Year! and a Question

Hey guys! I hope y'all had a fun start to 2013. I spent my new year in New York with some friends which was pretty sick. New year eve we went to my friend's cousin's place in Brooklyn for a party he was throwing. I got too drunk for my own good and got a little quite messy which I'm not the most proud of but whatever. I ended up being the first new year's kiss for my friend's hot cousin which was funny. We initially had bonded over sharing the same name which doesn't happen often since I have a less common, kinda old-fashioned name. Anyways, not too long after that my memory got a little more spotty but I didn't fully black out which is a plus. We left around 2:30 or so and made it back to her apartment in Manhattan around 3:15 or something around then. New Year day was spent mostly in bed. I got up around 1 but it wasn't until maybe 3 or slightly after that everyone was up. The hangover wasn't horrible and I avoided the headache, though the body aches weren't as forgiving.

The rest of the trip was spent mostly chilling and exploring Manhattan. It was cold, windy, and with one of my friends being sick, we couldn't do too much which was fine by me. It was nice to be able to do have some fun outside of Virginia before heading back to DC.

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So now I have a question for you guys:

The state of things between Brandon and I has me kinda confused and doing some thinking. First, I do like the guy; it's awesome spending time with him, but I don't know if things are going where either of us want. At this point, I'm looking for more than just being cuddle buddies or friends with benefits, and I don't know if that's what he's looking for. I also think if for whatever reason our relationship did end up being more. we might be too different for each other. I know I've made a point to say how I don't want everything to be similar between me and a guy I'm interested in, but this time around, I think things might be too far apart to be workable. We don't really share friend circles, he's working, I'm still in school, and given that, we don't really get to see each other either apart from maybe once a month when we arrange our schedules. In addition, our interests don't really overlap. Sure, we share a love for the Redskins and such, but there isn't anything we can both get really excited about. We aren't even really talking nearly as often now, and my major pet peeve - ignoring texts - is too common.

I don't know if people have gotten past this sort of thing and how they do it, but I'm seriously starting to think if I really should continue fretting over this. School's starting soon which is going to bring its own brand of stress inevitably. Also, what's worse, being woefully single or being in a relationship where uncertainty of where things stand rules? Going back to school soon could be a good "fresh start". Granted, my last two years at my school haven't exactly made me very excited about the prospects there, but hey, maybe some new people have come out of the woodwork (no pun intended) and there's the new freshman population to terrorize look into if I really have to.

I know you guys don't have all the details but do you have an opinion on this situation? Should I try and talk to him and see what the whole picture is like from his side, or just accept that maybe things are cooling down and let things happen?

All the best,

JP

5 comments:

  1. I'm always been a proponent of letting things happen...which in retrospect, has probably left me in the dust more often than not...so, I say, go after him if you really want him. It's painful and ignored texts are the worst but have lunch, talk about the "relationship", and then go from there.

    The guy I'm with has similar interests to me but more than that, he's interested in what I'm interested in and vice versa. Also, it's not so much about conversation as it is about feeling comfortable with a person to share "stuff" with. One of the things that made it easier for us to continue on our relationship is his Openess and telling me directly what he wanted from the relationship...which admittedly, scared me for a bit since I keep my issues close, but hey, beggars can't be choosers. And this beggar is, for the while, happier.

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    1. Yeah, everything you said makes sense. Right now I just don't know how to see this since things suddenly went from a 10 on the excitement scale to a 3 in no time flat. It just left me really confused.

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  2. I do not think you should "fret" over this issue. I know it's trite and even a bit pedantic to say it, but you have plenty of time to find a good fit for yourself. You are good looking, intelligent and seem to have a great outlook on life. That's a lot on offer my friend! I hate to see you worrying over someone who you can only manage to see once a month. If it's sexual release you are after, there are other opportunities out there I'm sure, and of course there's the old DIY method to tide you over from time to time. But for heaven's sake, you are young and have many opportunities in front of you. Let them come along in their own due time and enjoy school, friends and, yes, the occasional (and safe!) opportunity for a noncommittal shag. On the other hand, maybe I'm full of crap.

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    1. Thanks for the input. I think I just let myself see things to be more than what was likely there. It's a bad habit of mine. Nevertheless, I'll give myself time to cool down and let whatever and whoever come into my life in and see what happens, especially once I move back to school.

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    2. I get you on the seeing more than there really is thing. I have that problem with friends pretty frequently. I tend to feel there is a depth of connection and importance that isn't really there. Then find my self bothered when I discover its absence. Silly really. Anyway sounds to me like you have a good plan.

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